3 killed, 4 injured in celebratory hawai firing near ARY office 

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(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)

Three persons were killed and at least four injured, one of whom is in critical condition, due to aerial firing coming from the roof of the ARY news channel office building. 

According to police sources, the aerial firing took place some time in the afternoon on Monday, and was accompanied by loud shouts and what appeared to be beating drums. 

“Aerial firing is a menace, and needs to be controlled,” said Mushtaq Hussain, SHO of the area in which the firing had taken place.

“My team is normally on the look out for this, but it took us some time to respond because most of these incidents take place in the night during weddings. That is why there was so much damage this time around.”

“But we should have known these guys would do this today” he admitted. 

Meanwhile, the Pakistan Electronic Media Regulatory Authority (PEMRA) has issued notices to news channels that did not carry out any aerial firing from their office buildings.