FATF assures to move Pakistan off greylist as long as action taken against Cyril Almeida

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(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)

International anti-money laundering and terror financing watchdog Financial Action Task Force (FATF) has assured the Pakistani government that it would not only take Pakistan off it’s ‘greylist’ but would also argue for the most lenient of terms for the country at the IMF if appropriate punitive actions were to be taken against notorious Pakistani national Cyril Almeida.

“We have made our position to the Pakistani government clear,” said Marshall Billingslea, President of the FATF. “We want for this individual to face the consequences of his actions. At the moment, he is carrying out his activities completely unfettered and moves across borders quite easily.”

“It is encouraging to us for being put on the greylist and the (then) imminent prospect of being put on the ‘blacklist’ i.e ‘list of Non-Cooperative Countries or Territories’ has given Pakistan the clarity to clamp down on the problem: Cyril Almeida,” he continued.

“I’m going to notch this one as a success story,” Billingslea added. “Not just for us at the FATF, but also for Pakistan. A country that has finally figured the problem out.”