PM suspects he met with fake tycoons while actual tycoons met with other govt officials


(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)

Prime Minister Imran Khan on Friday discreetly voiced some suspicions that the delegation of business tycoons that he was meeting were, in fact, not actually business tycoons but decoys meant to throw him off while the actual tycoons met with other govt officials.

“I might be overthinking this, but something’s not right with this lot,” said a suspicious Imran Khan, while speaking to his advisor Naeem-ul-Haq. “For one, they are really, really young. Now I know one can achieve great things at a young age, but seriously, this young?”

Advisor Naeem-ul-Haq suggested that maybe these captains of industry and commerce had inherited their empires at a very young age, which pacified the prime minister somewhat, but not too much.

“This one says that he represents Dawood Hercules. Now, I know Hussein Dawood, but he says ‘umm…uh…haan woh taya hain merey,’ which would be the case, maybe, but something doesn’t ring right,” he said. “And why are they wearing charcoal shalwar-kameez, as if they were KP schoolchildren,” he asked.

The PM’s military attache then told him that the businessmen were actually doing this in solidarity with the students of KP. The PM’s suspicions were finally somewhat put to rest after a discussion with the delegation.

“They seemed really knowledgeable. They thought that the trade deficit was because of the corruption of PML, PPP, as was the fiscal deficit and the inflation rate.”

“In fact, their IQ and sheer understanding of the economy just might even rival mine.”