(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)
The nation’s fathers have urged the nation to reach the airport “at least 24 hours” before their respective flights.
Speaking at a press conference in Karachi, the nation’s fathers said it was always good to be prepared for all eventualities and it was better to be safe than sorry.
“Beta, if you are early and have to wait a bit, that isn’t as big a problem as being late,” said Hassan Zaidi, father of four.
“Sometimes, the procedures and even traffic on the way to the airport take time.”
“Yes, sometimes the customs clearance takes a very long time when there is maybe a shortage of staff or maybe too many passengers on the respective flights,” chimed in Shoaib Khattak, a doctor father of three.
“And sometimes there are foreign dignitaries at the airport and that really slows the whole system down.”
“Yes, but you don’t have to listen to us,” read the communique available at the press conference. “You are big now and can make your own decisions and know better than your mother and I, apparently.”
“I didn’t mean that,” the communique clarified. “You’ll do as you’re told.”
The press conference ended and the nation was invited for refreshments at the adjoining hall where the nation’s grandmothers were holding a press conference regarding how weak the nation had become and should eat these delicious snacks.