(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)
DURBAN – The Pakistan team management in the ongoing tour of South Africa has decided to list physiotherapist Cliffe Deacon as another among a long list of all-rounders currently at the squad’s disposal, The Dependent has learnt.
Sources within the Pakistan cricket team confirmed that the decision was taken by coach Mickey Arthur and captain Sarfaraz Ahmed together, after Deacon was seen holding a cricketer’s bat for 6 minutes and 52 seconds for one of the players, while the latter was about to get treatment.
Despite The Dependent’s investigations it could not be found which batsman’s bat Deacon had held, but sources have confirmed that he too is officially an all-rounder in the dressing room now.
“Since he’s a physiotherapist but can also hold a bat for around 7 minutes, which means that he can do two things. This makes him an all-rounder,” a PCB official said, confirming the team management’s decision to add more all-rounders to the squad.
“Furthermore, since he can hold the bat, he is henceforth being presented as a batting all-rounder. And you know the team management wants to stuff them in pretty much any format that we participate in,” added the official.
