(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)
ISLAMABAD – In what is the latest example of state’s decisive crackdown on militant organisations functioning in the country, Minister of State for Interior Shehryar Afridi on Tuesday confirmed that the state is seeking conclusive evidence against banned groups in Pakistan from other countries before launching a decisive crackdown on militant organisations functioning in the country.
“We want other countries to give us conclusive evidence against those groups that we have banned in our country. Not only would that evidence remind us why those groups were banned in our country to begin with, it would also remind us to ask for conclusive proof against other similar groups that are banned in the country,” Afridi said while addressing the media.
The Minister of State for Interior further sent out a message internationally, telling the world to know the difference between evidence and conclusive evidence.
“Evidence is showing the link between certain groups and individuals and terrorist activities. Conclusive evidence includes pivotal details like whether or not they are circumcised, what they had for breakfast the day they launched a terrorist attack, which is their favourite sports team, etc” he said.
Afridi further maintained that asking other countries, especially those neighbouring the state, for proof underlines Pakistan’s credentials as a peace loving country that wants regional and global cooperation.
At press time, the State Minister for Interior, was awaiting a classified fax from overseas of the comprehensive list of groups banned in Pakistan.
