‘Just something in my eye’ says Hamza Abbasi wiping away tears after Murad Saeed made Federal Minister

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(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)

Wiping away from his eyes what were clearly tears but what he claimed was ‘just some speck I got stuck in my eye,’ actor Hamza Ali Abbasi has said he is fine, and doing perfectly okay after PTI MNA Murad Saeed was tapped for a promotion to full Federal Minister.

According to details, Prime Minister Imran Khan during his review of his cabinet expressed satisfaction with the performance of Murad Saeed, who is the Minister of State for Communication, and had hinted at making him a full Federal Minister.   

“Why would I have anything to say about this? I mean Murad is the politician and I’m the actor. When Khan sb needs a minister, he’ll ask Murad. When he needs someone to play him in a biopic, he’ll ask me” he went on to say, even though the reporter had not asked any further questions.

“He would ask me, wouldn’t he? Wouldn’t he???” he said, turning the tables on our reporter by starting to pose questions.

I mean, Khan sb said it was just going to be the assembly ticket and nothing else. In fact, he told me that Murad would probably lose this time” he said, clearly frustrated.

“Then he made him a Minister of State, and I was pretty upset, but he said it was a political decision yada yada yada”

“But so publicly saying that he’s satisfied with Murad, I mean isn’t he satisfied with me? And making him a Federal Minister, this just, I don’t know what to feel” he went on to say.

“Now he’ll be cosying up to him even more in cabinet meetings that little . . .” he went on to say in a spiel not reproducible on these pages.

“But whatever. I’m fine. Just doing my own thing, and I trust Khan sb. Even if I don’t trust that slimy little . . .” he went on to say in the same vein.

“It’s the little things, you know?” he said, his voice suddenly low, “giving him the communication portfolio. He’s always going on about how good Murad is at communicating and how important that is in any relationship – it’s nauseating honestly” he ended.