(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)
LONDON – After repeatedly and vociferously being asked for ‘evidence’ to support his claims that Pakistan’s military establishment is censuring media outlets and manipulating the election process, Chief Executive Officer of Dawn Group of Publications Haroon Hameed abducted HARDtalk host Stephen Succur on Thursday night, The Dependent has learnt.
Succur, who had demanded that Hameed prove his claims on the show that the establishment is curbing free press and fabricating the election process, was lifted by two men outside the BBC Office and taken inside a van, where Haroon Hameed was waiting for him.
“So this is how they do it,” Hameed said as he sat on the backseat with a blindfolded and tied down Succur, while the two men who lifted the BBC journalist sitting at the front. “Here is your evidence as to how the establishment censures media and curbs freedom of speech in Pakistan.”
Sources reveal that Hameed then picked up a box from behind the seat and opened it, taking a few items out of it. Succur was then given the option of choosing between two shirts of a political party which he was to wear.
Both shirts were of the same party and the HARDtalk host was to make the choice blindfolded. Succur was then given the text for his next HARDtalk show.
At press time, Succur was shouting “alright, alright I get it,” sitting at the back of the van alone, still blindfolded and tightly roped.
