(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)
The Indian government has conveyed to the nation’s Supreme Court that the documents pertaining to the controversial Rafale deal were burnt in the infamous fire that gutted the Lahore Development Authority (LDA) Plaza in May, 2013.
“We would have loved to help, but we just don’t have the requisite documents,” said K.K Venugopal, India Attorney General. “So, nothing to see here, I think.”
The government had submitted this information during the review petition related to the purchase of 36 multirole fighter aircraft for a price estimated at €7.8 billion by the Defence Ministry of India from France’s Dassault Aviation.
Upon being told by the court that there were bound to be copies of the documents otherwhere, the government’s counsel said, “Would be obliged if the Lordships were to inform us where so we could…take care of the situation.”