(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)
Speaking in the vast but lonely expanses of a large room in a palatial house in Islamabad, a slumped over dentist while holding his throbbing head said “It’s not the same thing, but being President dulls the pain of not being real doctor.”
The dentist, who also serves part time as President of Pakistan, said this speaking to an empty room and his deepest, darkest inner most thoughts.
“I hold the highest office in the land but I’m a cheat. I use doctor in front of my name but I’m no real doctor” he said speaking to the expanses of his own consciousness.
“I mean I guess this Presidency thing is a silver lining and everything, but what even is the point when I’m still not a real doctor” he went on to think.
According to details, the President spent much of his time crying in a corner, screaming at the stoic Presidential guards to “talk to me”, promising them free dental check ups but to no avail.
When no journalist seemed interested either, the President decided to hold a press conference with his most intimate emotions.
“I’m a B+. All my life I’ve been telling people I’m an A. But I’m a B+. And you know what the worst part about that is? I think I’m ok with it” he sad in response to questions posed by childhood trauma.
“I should have listened to my friends and family when they told me to study. Just a little extra effort and I could’ve made merit for real doctor” he said answering a tough one posed by regrets.
The presser ended when the President nodded off.
