Missed multiparty protest because my tyre got punctured in Model Town: Shehbaz Sharif

(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)

LAHORE – Pakistan Muslim League-Nawaz (PML-N) President Shahbaz Sharif on Thursday explained that his absence from the multiparty alliance’s protest against alleged poll rigging a day earlier was due to the tyre of his car being punctured in Lahore’s Model Town area and nothing else.

Shahbaz was the most notable absentee when an array of political leaders, united under the newly formed ‘Pakistan Alliance for Free and Fair Elections’, held a protest demonstration outside the Election Commission of Pakistan in Islamabad on Wednesday against alleged rigging in the July 25 general elections.

He explained today that his absence should not be misconstrued and reiterated that his party stands with the 11-party grand alliance on the issue.

“All the opposition parties held a comprehensive but peaceful protest yesterday,” Shahbaz said during a media talk following his visit to Adiala Jail. “I couldn’t be there because my tyre got punctured in Model Town. No matter what people say, this is the truth.”

Later, speaking exclusively to The Dependent Sharif said that he was just leaving home from Model Town when the tyre punctured right outside their gate.

“This would not have been a problem if someone  hadn’t been negligent about checking when the tyres were due for a rotation” he said without naming anyone in particular, but quite clearly giving his son Hamza the stink eye.

“This someone didn’t even remember to get the stepney repaired” he ended in a huff.