Witness clowns and acrobats all trying luck at tightrope walking
Let us leave the commonalities that ‘Big Marble Palace’ share with ‘Circus’-a terminal venue of awe, wonder and astonishment and join me as I take you on a tour of Panamagate hearings
Answer this: when was the last time you’ve been to a circus? Well, if you are in your 20s or above chances are that you’ve been to the wonderland where a large group of men and women rode unicycles, acrobats flew in the air hither and thither, clowns insulted, slapped, and played tricks on each other to eke out laughs and performers did all that is humanely possible for a hearty round of applause.
Well, dearest sirs and ma’ams, since the days of old ‘Lucky Irani’ type big tops are numbered we looked around for a replacement. And of all the places, our eyes, hearts, ears and gut finally found ‘Big Marble Palace’ to satiate our much-needed dose of awe and amusement. The once solemn, silent ‘Big Marble Palace’, for all intents and purposes, is our replacement for grand old ‘Lucky Irani Circus’.
Make no mistake, this time around, the spectators are few, dignified, robed and trained to put up with the antics and acrobatics, tricks and illusions, arguments and opinions of performers and magicians clad in black. They don’t laugh, they remain thoughtful. They don’t applaud, they ask questions. They can’t be over-awed with the daft sleight of hand, they probe. They see a clever trick for what it is; a clever trick, nothing more, may be less.
Let us leave the commonalities that ‘Big Marble Palace’ share with ‘Circus’-a terminal venue of awe, wonder and astonishment and join me as I take you on a tour of Panamagate hearings.
Dearest sirs and ma’ams, so far these hearings have devoured thousands of notepads, bought specially to write ‘tickers’ as cellphones are not allowed inside the court, many fellow journos also rue the fact that countless MBs of mobile data gets wasted when they send these ‘ticker’ to newsroom and lazy colleagues.
Outside ‘Big Marble Palace’ one witnesses the sight of hundreds of policemen holding sleek batons and dressed to deter any nuisance, then comes the deafening sound of generators installed in scores of DSNG vans, and lastly a galaxy of mics and cameras strategically placed before two separate podiums to make sure that defenders of ‘defendants’ and sepoys of ‘petitioners’ don’t have to vie for the screen time on prime time telly.
Two walkthrough gates, one scanner, two sets of staircases, and after surrendering one’s cell phone at a desk, one is allowed to enter the room where our Honorable Lordships hear a momentous case that may affect (even alter) the future of a sitting prime minister of Pakistan, future of a man who wants to become prime minister of Pakistan in the future, future of the children of present prime minister of Pakistan, and, to cut a long story short, many ‘futures’ depend on the decision they’ll pen down.
Inside the courtroom lordships are presiding, counsels are arguing, journos are scribbling away important points, loyalists from both treasury and opposition are listening attentively, some of them fidgeting while others looking around blankly. Peace and calm reigns supreme. There is no hullabaloo, no yelling, no finger pointing, no mudslinging, and no shouting match. The counsel addresses the bench and the bench either seeks clarification from the counsel or makes remarks every now and then.
For the talk show watching lot, a trip to the court hearing will be nothing short of surreal. Since, the proceeding has no agitated hosts, no commercial breaks, no brownie points, and no spleen and angst aimed at one’s enemy. We can rightly term the proceedings as ‘Anti 7-11 pm slot on idiot box’.
Once the hearing is adjourned, the lordships retire to their chambers while folks march back to the world where mics, podiums, cameras, and tickers await them. Those who were silently listening a couple of minutes back roar and thunder and tell the masses that all is going in the right direction (read in their favour) and the opponent will bite the dust soon.
Once the hearing is adjourned, the lordships retire to their chambers while folks march back to the world where mics, podiums, cameras, and tickers await them
From then on, dearest sirs and ma’ams, we enter the ruthless world of circus, staged outside the courtroom and well within the bounds of ‘Big Marble Palace’. The clowns, the midgets, the flamethrowers, the snake eaters, the unicyclists, the lion and elephant tamers and the lot start mesmerising us with one trick followed by another.
Since, we, the people love to hate the one who is in power and our sympathies always side with the underdog. And our most trusted herald (read media) knows exactly what to do to make hearings more interesting and more entertaining: when hearing is underway, we play the tickers, when hearing is adjourned, we broadcast the statements of loyalists outside the court. No points for guessing what follows; talk shows on all channels where analysts, specialists, intellects, scholars, poets, actors, actresses and religious scholars shed light on worldly and otherworldly aspects of the hearing during the day.
Time to wrap this column up with a question for you all to contemplate in your silent moments: What silent, solemn lordships, fully aware that what is presented before them is a performance, will decide and whose future will flourish and whose will perish?
