LAHORE: Well, it’s nice to know that the agony of Kashmir is over, that Kashmir Solidarity Day has led to the end of the Indian repression in the valley. Particularly inspiring was the way that Pakistanis turned up in large numbers. Now, the Indians really must be shaking in their shoes (assuming they have any).
Of course, there were signs of naya Pakistan. There was a repeated post which said that filers (of tax returns) would have to stand for only 30 minutes, while non-filers would have to remain for the full 60 minutes. The CBR’s commitment to the Kashmir cause, as we all know, is second to none, and they have probably decided not to charge any duty on material imported to play a role in the Kashmir liberations struggle. Like cardboard and markers for placards.
Incidentally, rumours that the Punjab chief minister would demonstrate the almost lost art of writing with one’s feet on placards at the Faisal Chowk rally proved totally false. He and the governor made sure that India gave up its occupation of Kashmir. I realise that it was a great struggle holding himself back at Faisal Chowk when he wanted to be east of the Line of Control (LoC), but both duty and the governor held him back.
However, there were signs that what I feared was happening. The Kashmir cause is not uniting the whole country, but just becoming another partisan marker. The next step, I suppose, will be to blame the abrogation of Article 370 in India not on Narendra Modi, but on each other’s party leader. The PTI will add the claim that Mian Nawaz took a bribe from India before it went ahead.
I wonder if the government intends to adopt the Khurshid Kasuri method of protesting for the cause. When foreign minister, Kasuri once dozed off at a meeting. Supporters (of which I am proud to be one) said that he was actually protesting for the Kashmir cause. That weapon should be deployed now that we seem to be practising the Naveed Qamar method of defence; he fell asleep while defence minister. His proposal, that a CNS (Chief of Nap-time Staff) be appointed, was not approved. The existing CNS (Chief of Naval Staff) objected.
I wonder if the ASC will distribute neend ki golian, instead of bullets? I’m not worried though. The time to be worried is when the army begins requisitioning cattle, because I have heard that the latest strategy will be to drive the cattle among the Indian troops. They won’t dare shoot at the cows.
Still, even though it was not known where he marched, the former world welterweight boxing champion Amir Khan was on the LoC before Solidarity Hour, where he was presumably imparting useful skills to the locals.
While Amir Khan was not in the army, his grandfather, Lal Khan, had been. He was a Janjua from Kahuta, which is not too far from the LoC, so there’s a multigenerational link there.
Of course, with Amir Khan on the LoC, I was reminded of the exchange from the end of the film A Fish Called Wanda. One character begins to move his fists and says, “I’d better warn you. I boxed for Oxford”. The other guy says, “Well, I’ve killed for the CIA.” and pulls out a pistol.
The army is not always a guarantee, though. Look at the Brazilian army, which has sent troops into the Amazon to fight the fires there. As the Amazon rainforest is what keeps the world’s air breathable, those fires caused enough of panic in the developed world for it to offer Brazil $20 million. Brazil didn’t take the money. Catch Pakistan turning down $20 million.
I wonder why there is a fuss about the accountability court judges being sent back to the Lahore High Court. Were videos of the judges discovered? After all, it was the day that Judge Arshad Malik had his matter examined, wasn’t it? Worse, maybe there weren’t any videos. Wouldn’t it have been simpler to contact the judges’ readers? Does the government have any problem getting the verdicts it wants? I hope no one has been getting any illusions about judicial independence.
There has been a lot of headshaking about the prorogation of the British Parliament. Well, over here, it’s merely routine. In fact, parliament was prorogued without meeting. The joint session which was called to hear the president’s speech was abruptly cancelled. Corrupt elements were going to protest the government’s principled stand of appointing members of the election commission without evolving the consensus demanded by the constitution.
The suggestion that the president’s speech be tabled in the near future and ‘taken as read’ won favour in the cabinet, but not in the presidency. He already has the speech sent him by the government, and it would be hardly fair to not let him read it.
After all, that was the only indication the nation had, once a year, that the president was indeed alive.
