(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)
FAISALABAD – Veteran FIFA Uncle, who claims to have seen each of the last 12 World Cups, on Wednesday predicted that one out of 32 teams participating in this year’s tournament in Russia would win the World Cup.
FIFA Uncle who says he has accurately predicted each of the previous 12 World Cup winners in a family get-together went out on his limb and said that the team that eventually wins the tournament will be one of the four semifinalists.
Eyewitnesses claim that FIFA Uncle accurately predicted that Germany would win the 2014 World Cup. “Germany will beat Argentina 1-0 in the final,” he had said a day after the final addressing an audience entirely consisting of people who did not know that there had been a World Cup going on.
At press time, FIFA Uncle revealed his favourites for this year’s World Cup during Iftar time with family and friends.
“The player that scores the most goals will win the Golden Boot – write it down,” he said loudly, gesturing with his hand that he had firmly got this prediction.
When pressed to take names, FIFA Uncle went a step further.
“Cristiano Ronaldo looks like winning the World Cup for Brazil,” he said. “Although my bet is on whichever team scores the most goals in the final match of the tournament.”