(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)
The National Accountability Bureau has, on Wednesday, taken notice of a media report against the Sharif family, hot on the heels of its notice of another such report in Ausaaf newspaper, which had revealed a total of 4.9 billion being laundered into India.
The new notice is of a story from Khawateen Digest. The submission, titled Woh Ajnabi, told the story of a national politician, who becomes the Punjab chief minister, who ensnares the underconfident-yet-beautiful protagonist Sughra in his web of deceit.
Initially, Sughra, a principled young woman from androon Lahore, kept rejecting his advances, but eventually succumbed to his charms. Extremely rich, quite bald and already married, the politician ticked all the boxes for what Sughra had wanted in a husband.
After getting married in a clandestine ceremony, Sughra shifts to a house in Gulberg that he has bought her.
Subsequent passages of the story were highlighted for the benefit of the court with a pink marker, where Sughra overhears a conversation between the politician and visiting guests where they speak of buying up property in London with “awaam ka paisa, muhahah!”
NAB sources further revealed that the Bureau is going to also take notice of a SMS from a PML-N member called Asma From Hospital which revealed corruption worth Rs 20.