(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)
Their lordships of the higher courts have summoned Pakistan cricket Chief Selector Inzamam ul Haq to appear before the Superior Court to explain the continued absence of Fawad Alam from the national side.
The summons came late on Friday night after news had been confirmed that Fawad Alam would not be going to Ireland and England, even though there were a number of injuries in the team and reliable batsmen for desperately needed.
“First they call him to the camp at Gadaffi and get fans excited. Then they say he’s in the best shape out of all the players, and then they chose to select two uncapped openers. Like what even” a source close to the lordships told The Dependent.
According to another source in the PCB, the letter containing the summons seemed to be particularly angry, and had disposed of drab legal language in favour of expletives and frustration.
“The letters arrived at the Chairman and Chief Selector’s in brown envelopes which read ‘Faadi ko kyun nahi khilatay $**%&#^’ scrawled on top in hand” said the PCB source.
The representative of their lordships explained this by saying that their honours were all ardent cricket followers and were passionate about the game in every regard.
“I mean, the guy had an average of more than 60. What more could you want? Is it any wonder that the judges are angry over this snubbing?” they added.