Local village officer still patwari of hearts

CHAK JHUMRA – A little over a week after Punjab government had decided to change his entire existence through Chief Minister Usman Buzdar’s approval...

Plan B to be launched against supporters of Plan A: Fazl

ISLAMABAD – The Plan A sit-in of the Jamiat Ulema-e-Islam Fazl (JUI-F) in the federal capital ended on Wednesday as party chief Fazlur Rehman...

‘Smogistan’ – New South Asian movement demands separate homeland along air quality index

LAHORE/NEW DELHI/TORONTO/LONDON – Yet another separatist movement has emerged in South Asia with an independent homeland being demanded in what was the British Punjab...

Punctual Shehbaz reaches airport early in anticipation of flight with Mian Nawaz

As the matter of removal of Nawaz Sharif’s name from the Exit Control List (ECL) remains in lingo with the ball now in LHC’s...

JUI-F gets token number 245/500 for protest queue in Lahore

JUI-F Chief Maulana Fazlur Rehman’s plan to bock all major highways across the country, after deciding to end his party’s Dharna in Islamabad, has...

Bangladesh plans war museum modelled on Karachi museum with 90,000 mannequins

(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.) Impressed by the recently upgraded PAF museum in Karachi, which...

PBS removes tomatoes from basket-of-goods to fight inflation

The Pakistan Bureau of Statistics has decided to remove tomatoes from the Basket of Goods that it uses to calculate inflation in an attempt...

Kartarpur, DHA Phases 8,9,10 also sacred Hindu sites: RSS

Hot on the heels of the decision by the Indian Supreme Court to rule in favour of the Hindu appellants in the Babri Masjid...

‘I can uproot hand-pump with pinkie finger’, intimidating Buzdar whispers in Sunny Deol’s ear

KARTARPUR – Issuing a timely and stern reminder on who was the real macho man in a gathering otherwise designed to promote peace in...

Didn’t know of the 2014 dharna, found out through TV, Imran claims

Responding to widespread criticism of his opposition to the ongoing JUI-F dharna given how he himself staged a dharna back in 2014, Prime Minister...

Marshall of ‘Marshall Law’ also Jemima’s cousin, reveals Mufti Kifayatullah

ISLAMABAD – Clearly in possession of classified family trees released by a yet to be identified whistleblower, Jamiat Ulema-e-Islam’s (JUI-F) central leader Mufti Kifayatullah...

‘If you found Dharna Green sexy, wait till you see my PM Resignation Day...

LAHORE – Making final preparations to depart for London, Opposition Leader and President of the Pakistan Muslim League-Nawaz (PML-N) Shehbaz Sharif told the paparazzi...

Anti-Khalistan Cell also formed alongside Khalistan Cell after learning Lahore also part of Khalistan

The national security agencies have formed an Anti-Khalistan Cell in addition to their earlier established Khalistan Cell after they gained information from Wikipedia that...

Nation urged to stop condemning dharna performed by Indian agent as per his role...

RAWALPINDI – The funded project which has seen a sit-in inside the capital has been in the headlines ever since its trailer got released....

Bhutto family emotional watching little Bilawal grow old enough to ally with religious bigots...

LARKANA – The aunts, uncles, cousins among selected members of the immediate, adopted and extended Bhutto family, who participated in this week’s family conference...

Kartarpur Corridor won’t compromise our dedication to mutually assured destruction, vow India and Pakistan

ISLAMABAD/NEW DELHI/KARTARPUR – The November 9 opening of the Kartarpur Corridor linking Darbar Sahib in Pakistan with Dera Baba Nanak shrine in India’s Gurdaspur...

Government too busy to get involved in governance activities: Government Spokesperson

(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.) The PTI-led government is being severely criticised for its inability...