Gone too far
A man hesitatingly tells a feminist, ‘I think I am in love with you.’ ‘Is it because I am a woman?’ she snaps. This may only be a joke but like all good ones, it has the merit of being absurd and yet not being too far removed from reality. While every ism can, with a little work, be taken to the level of silliness or worse; the author is convinced that if that ism happens to be feminism perhaps the effort required is the least of all.
As is so often the case in such matters, the tone for feminists is set by the West. Of course, feminism started in fine style advocating for better economic opportunities, respect, and social rights for women – doubtless a noble cause. This meant sharing the good things of life equally with men. Women’s yearning for equality was understandable after centuries of playing second fiddle to men.
Feminism soon turned into an exaggerated ‘celebration’ of the female gender. Being a woman was nothing to be apologetic about, it was announced from rooftops. Extreme examples of this include the emancipated ladies in Europe and North America, who hold bodily hygiene and getting rid of superfluous hair to be discriminatory to their gender. The focus thus seemed to have somehow shifted to emulating men in everything bad. Feminism was evolving. For the record, this scribe recognizes their right of carrying themselves however they want to despite his strong reservations on the aesthetics (or lack thereof) of the whole arrangement.
Of course, not all feminists are as extreme as this: there are numerous less acute manifestations of the malady, albeit barely less so. Young Sydney mother Maddie, for example, found out that Australian women could be more Western than the Westerners in terms of setting new – or crazier – standards for feminism. Maddie, who had innocently asked fellow moms and wives suggestions for her husband’s lunch, was in for the shock of her life. She was called everything from a ‘slave’ to a ‘1950s housewife’ by members of her closed Facebook page. Some of the messages she received were: ‘I make my husband the same thing he makes me. Nothing!’; ‘He’s lucky if I decide to make dinner some nights’; ‘I was married for twenty years and my favorite packed lunch for my husband was called a Get it yourself with a side order of I’m not your mother.’ Three cheers for emancipation!
We are of course light years behind the West in science and arts but when it comes to this sort of enlightenment, once the tone is set by the masters, some of the more heroic spirits amongst us get to work immediately to try and match or even outdo them. So it is that our very own Sharmeen Obaid has struck a great blow for feminism by getting a Karachi doctor allegedly fired from his job. His crime: ‘messing with the wrong family’ by ‘harassing’ her younger sister. The mode of harassment apparently was ‘trying to add her on FB’! (All quotes are from Sharmeen’s tweets.) For the uninitiated: Nobody can unilaterally add anybody on FB – one can only ask to be added; and for the benefit of ‘sensitive’ souls, Facebook has provided the provision to disable the friend-request option (Something the big sister has apparently opted for), closing once and for all the door to this sort of ‘harassment’.
It’s not just the feminists who are responsible for matters having come this far. The trouble is that most Liberal men and women (those that aren’t even feminists) cannot dare being ‘caught’ criticizing the female ‘liberation’ movement for fear of being thought old-fashioned. Especially men are considered coming straight from the cave unless they echo, or at the very least acquiesce in, the notions of feminists as they soar to each new height of silliness. There are of course a few considerate souls among them too who indulge the feminists, considering the thousands of years of dominance by their gender. The feminists, seeking legal and social over-compensation for centuries of subjugation to men, have been winning and losing many battles. Winning one battle has encouraged going for the next frontier, so to speak. On the other hand, being thwarted in a cause has made it possible to play the victim card, starting the cycle all over again, triggering more radicalism. Be that as it may, the net result is the chip-on-the-shoulder, reverse-sexist, and often belligerent brand of feminism according to which a man approaching a woman in any way can be declared harassment (or not – depends completely on the woman); while the other way around is charming friendliness or at most harmless flirting.
The trouble with feminism, as with drugs and other heady and intoxicating things, is that for the same level of exhilaration, it keeps demanding bigger and bigger doses. Is there an end in sight to the madness on display? The answer appears to be in the negative; and as far as the ordinary mortal is concerned, there’s no realistic solution to the problem either. This is especially so because most of the FB ‘intellectuals’ who have solutions to all of mankind’s problems in the form of pithy one-liners themselves happen to be liberals terrified of their wives or of losing their ‘intellectual’ reputation, whichever comes first.
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