And there is nothing we wish to do about it
It is not a tale of yore when failures of students were associated only with incompetency and clumsiness. No other reason was entertained as a possibility behind inability of a student to perform well in curricular activities. The only grade acceptable to parents was A+ and the sole prospect of resting with an A grade was in cases where it was the highest awarded grade. Either your child is adroit enough to make his mark, or he is a dead loss who is completely unfit to compete with others; there was no middle way.
Critically acclaimed movies like ‘Dead Poets Society’ (1989) and ‘Taare Zameen Par’ (2007) narrate the aforementioned mindset in a much convincing way that eventually led to discussions regarding the likes and dislikes of students as directed by their own set of capabilities. Such movies, for the first time, made people realise the odds of every child being inheritor of unique and distinct set of attributes that make each individual a rara avis in reality. Besides, another significant aspect spotlit by these movies was the probability of suffering from any of the myriad of psychological disorders that create obstacles in the way of conventional learning.
Dyslexia is just one of the illnesses. Yet another one is depression, a condition that affects people of all ages, genders and professions and, consequently, is one of the most common disorders, yet the least acknowledged. It is only lately that people have started paying heed to its existence. Otherwise it was only a couple of years ago that convincing people on this notion even after having presented several signs and symptoms was equivalent to banging head against a brick wall. Unfortunately, we needed a formal approval from constituent members of this society because had they not recognised it as a disorder it would not have existed at all.
Depression is among the leading mental health challenges faced by people aged 15-34 years. It is a term that collectively describes a number of disorders which are characterised by feelings of guilt or lower self-worth, tiredness, poor concentration, disturbed sleep, loss of appetite, loss of interest or pleasure, and subsequent sadness. Recurrent or enduring, depression substantially impairs an affected individual’s ability to function in a prescribed manner at school or workplace or even during household chores, as implied by aforementioned signs and symptoms, eventually leading to self-annihilation, the worst form of which is suicide. The first time the average-minded denizens of the Indian subcontinent were made to realise the complications of depression was through ‘3 idiots’ (2009), a movie that not only showed the dark reality of ‘grades vs life’ debate but also brought into limelight the loopholes in our mindset and education system.
So let’s talk about it today, because it is already quite late. We have already sacrificed several beautiful souls in the name of considering keeping one’s mouth shut a great virtue. Although these brave fighters were single-handedly enduring the harshness of stress, anxiety and depression, they gave in only after having reached their threshold point because, after all, they all were lone warriors. The consequence was embodied in the form of their dead bodies, either as a result of ‘natural’ death or due to suicide. No one was there to extend a helping hand to them, no parent, no friend, no teacher. The reasons are two-fold: a) none of their acquaintances knew about their mental state; b) they criminally turned blind eye to their moments of mental and/or physical breakdown.
Maryam Khaleeq, an A Level student who was put under undue stress by her teachers for ostensibly not being able to ‘perform well’ in academics despite her brilliance, could not withstand subjection to incessant discouragement and passed away days before the results were announced. The problem lies in the preceding sentence. Performance is judged by grades which, in no capacity whatsoever, can correctly gauge one’s brilliance or intelligence. Regretfully, we all pass through this phase but somehow brush it aside when it comes to others. There could be literally a thousand reasons behind not being able to participate in class on a particular day the way others do. And what is meant by participation also needs to be highlighted: from laughing at silly jokes cracked by teachers to bearing with physical harassment and taunting remarks, there are no decreed limits of ‘class participation’. It is our rotten luck that the future of our students is jeopardised in this manner even in private school setups. In Maryam’s case particularly, the distinction she bagged in Law and A+’s in other subjects are a vindication of the cruelty of our baneful education system which, despite all her abilities, undermined her only because she might have chosen a different road to the same destination – academic excellence.
Aizaz Ali’s tale is no different from Maryam’s. The only difference, perhaps, was the way their lives ended. Aizaz’s story has two sides to discuss: a NUST graduate and an unemployed engineer. After spending a year looking for jobs to win bread for his family, accruing nothing but piles of rejections, and seeking medical help for depression, he finally acquiesced to his circumstances and gave this society what it wanted – another dead body to bury just like Aizaz’s ambitions. In a society where ‘references’ is the strongest section of one’s curriculum vitae and where nepotism is the weightiest criterion in filling vacancies, the only way out for graduates like Aizaz to secure eternal peace is shooting themselves twice in the head.
Musa Naeem, a freshman at Nishat College Multan, is yet another victim of the same pernicious system. His friends say that he had a melodious voice, but the extended social group surrounding him needed grades. His fellows say that he was an extremely talented singer, but people around him wanted to see him as an extremely courteous student. He gave up because he did not want to give in.
Now the most apposite question is: Who is to blame? In current scenario, where career counselling is the most forsaken department in any institution, where stress management is a concept still unknown to the lion’s share, where marks and grades are the sole barometer to measure one’s intellect, where rote learning is the only technique known to teachers who then use it to excogitate all sorts of questions in exams, including multiple-choice and short, where anyone among the givers and takers of knowledge who raises voice against this norm has to face severe backlash from the mainstream, where mental pressures like depression and anxiety are treated nothing more than mere excuses and seeking help in such situations is highly discouraged, and where no one is ready to think out of the box and is fully convinced to overlook the harsh realities of life that do affect individuals, it becomes highly difficult to disentangle the complexly entwined fabric of our social and education systems.
Suicide, as portrayed in and by our society, is not an act of cowardice. Falling from a great height or blasting one’s own skull is still as great a terror as for a non-depressed person. It is just that the invisible agony of the affected reaches such an unendurable level that it seems to be the only possible way out. Stigmatising such deaths and tagging such individuals as ‘abnormal’ is the same as disregarding the root causes of such incidents. If anything is to be blamed at all, it is our mindset and approach with which we perceive situations and are reluctant in viewing them from another lens except ours. As Albert Camus says, “But in the end one needs more courage to live than to kill himself”.
