The ‘big’ Eid

Random observations (small ones)

It is said about a particularly zealous period in Christian history – before the First Council of Nicaea to be exact – that you couldn’t meet a person in the street without him asking you to enlighten him regarding your understanding of the Trinity. In the current devout age of our own history, you can’t get your car repaired near the ‘big’ Eid without the mechanic (even if you don’t know him from Adam) asking, ‘Bakra kar rahe hain ya gaaye?’

The tasks of sacrificing animals, getting outside a lot of meat, and that of congratulating one’s self for being more pious than some, have all been successfully carried out on a mass-scale. The hangover of holidays is also over, and all eyes are now set on the next set of holidays, which happens to be just around the corner. As for the sense of utter meaninglessness of this rituals-obsessed existence, well that, I guess, is the inescapable lot of the thoughtful.

In many ways, this year’s Eid was like past Eids. It was of course celebrated with ‘religious zeal and traditional fervour’. (One would have to go a very long way back to recall an Eid that was observed with anything less.) As is usually the case too, thousands were admitted to hospitals on account of gastrointestinal disorders caused by overeating.

There were, of course, the usual discussions about whether animal-sacrifice was mandatory. This year, I found myself in the middle of an especially charged debate on the question. Emotions were flying around like shells from a Tommy gun in the hands of a trigger-happy maniac. Just when it seemed that a brawl was inevitable, a keen student of human psyche (not this scribe) opined that anything that so unmistakably rendered the pious apart from the not-so-pious couldn’t conceivably be non-mandatory. Those on the ‘mandatory’ side failed to get the sarcasm, so both parties agreed to the statement without reservation. Violence was thus averted and the day saved.

There were a few novelties too. Selfies are of course done to death every year, but the charming Amin Hafeez made history by sharing a velfie documenting for posterity Amin Hafeez’s Eid prayer. The Urdu running commentary was provided by… you guessed it, Amin Hafeez. What’s more, being a disinterested and objective reporter through and through, and true to the best journalistic tradition, not once does he refer to himself in the first person – but always in the third person plural.

This time the spirit of sacrifice was not confined to killing animals. On the eve of Eid, the overblown egos of some motorway policemen were also apparently sacrificed. However, since we don’t know many things about the incident, we must not jump to conclusions. It could have been nothing more than a terrible misunderstanding. Those accused of violence may have been under the erroneous impression that some parts of the constitution had been held in abeyance that day. One can think of other explanations as well. We should therefore refrain from passing judgment, especially now that the nation has been assured that the law will take its course.

Talking of differences from past Eids, the MQM didn’t collect animal skins this year, making at least one decision a little easier for Karachiites. This is of course no trivial matter, especially since history books are silent as to the correct way of disposing of the skin.

Animals were subjected to the usual torture. No I am not referring to their slaughter per se, but the general treatment they were given by the sellers, transporters, buyers, their kids and servants, and the butcher-impersonators. One particularly cruel incident (captured on video) is permanently etched in memory, and it is reasonable to believe that this was not an isolated case. The ‘butcher’ – probably a cobbler in plain clothes – tries to subdue a cow that naturally doesn’t see eye to eye with him in the matter of slaughter. He puts a bucket on its head and strikes the latter in order to knock the cow out, conceivably to spare it pain during the actual slaughtering. When this noble plan fails, the mob (the butcher and his ‘assistants’) start hitting the cow all over the body, and probably break all its legs. That is where I stopped watching. The slaughter itself must have come as a welcome relief for the cow.

According to reports, some people, in view of the Congo virus scare, did desist from their usual practice and donated an equivalent amount as charity. However, an overwhelming majority decided to look the virus in the eye and not to blink first. Subsequent events have vindicated these brave fellows, despite very few precautionary measures taken by all parties concerned. God is indeed great.

During the holidays, another thought-provoking image was doing the rounds on the social media, although the photo itself is probably an old one.  An extremely tired looking Shoaib Akhtar in pilgrims’ attire is sitting with similarly clad Maulanas Junaid Jamshed and Tariq Jamil. Why he is so exhausted (while the other two gents are absolutely radiating freshness), when it’s obviously some sort of a deluxe-tour package he is enjoying, not to mention the august company, is of course not for me to say.

This year’s Eid and its ‘festivities’ may be over, but there will, of course, be more Eids and other occasions offering immense opportunities for commercialism and one-up-man-ship to masquerade as spirituality and piety; opportunities for flaunting wealth and status in the name of religion – the most satisfying type, that is.

A belated ‘Eid mubaarak’ to you!