‘Might as well’
Islamabad – Our Judicial Commission Correspondent: The Pakistan Tehreek-e-Insaf (PTI), under the presumed conclusion that it is going to lose the next general elections, has filed a petition in the apex court, challenging the legitimacy of the 2018 general elections.
“Well, there always is an advantage in getting a headstart in these matters,” said Sharifuddin Pirzada, the PTI’s counsel for the petition. “It will give my team and I plenty of time to present our evidence in front of the court.”
“As soon as my dues for the 2013 petition are cleared, of course,” the famed lawyer added.
The decision seems to have proven to be a shot in the arm for the party, whose workers’ morale had been faltering ever since a specially constituted judicial commission gave a verdict dismissing the PTI’s allegations regarding the 2013 general elections.
Speaking at a huge rally in Faisalabad, party chairman Imran Khan said, “We condemn the future rigging that will take place under the watch of election commissioner [to be determined]. Specifically, we would like to take to court the caretaker chief minister of the Punjab [to be determined] who is clearly a PML-N agent.”
“Not only that, we have also named caretaker chief minister Khyber Pakhtunkhwa [to be determined], who is clearly an ANP agent,” he said. “Or JUI-F agent; we will submit the name of the party once we find out who will have creamed us at the polls there.”
Interest, if not support, has come from unexpected quarters. “It’s really quite interesting,” said Professor Pervez Hoodbhoy, former professor of physics at the Quaid-e-Azam University. “It’s pre-crime as has been popularised by the Philip K Dick-written, Spielberg-directed movie Minority Report.”
“The crime has been detected before it has taken place. Now if we look at the physics of it: the total amount of information entropy in the universe and the gravitation towards disorder, you will see that the amount of evidence that the PTI had against both the 2013 elections and the upcoming 2018 elections are both the same. The physics of this is fascinating,” said the noted scientist.
“Wait,” he said. “Let me draw you a diagram… hold on, where are you going?”
Reports suggest that the party might also be filing petitions for the 2023, 2027 and 2032 elections.
