Alec Baldwin and wife Hilaria welcomed daughter Carmen Gabriela today in New York and, having forged the path, Ireland Baldwin has already provided her new baby sister with a very detailed road map for growing up as a privileged kid with famous (and famously volatile) parents.
“You will eventually make your own decisions, but hopefully you will listen to and use the knowledge I have gained from my past experiences and from the results of my many mistakes,” the 17-year-old model wrote in a welcome note for Carmen, posted on the teen’s Tumblr.
Acknowledging that she was providing “simply the most complicated of lists,” Alec’s daughter with ex-wife Kim Basinger launched into the tailor-made life lessons, noting that she hoped by the time Carmen was reading the letter, they would “be best friends, sitting in some rad coffee shop in Brooklyn, talking about bands and how…Channing Tatum used to be hot. Maybe cars will be hovering. Ireland tackled everything from body image and peer pressure to homework and boys, but she kicked off with a doozy.
“Remember that your parents will always love you,” she wrote. “As a kid, you forget that sometimes. When they are screaming about this and bickering about that. It hurts. Grown ups yell. I don’t know why, but they do. No matter what your mom or Dad says or does, simply remember that they love the s—t out of you. NEVER forget it.” And when it comes to fighting, “WALK AWAY,” she advised. “Especially with your parents. I have said many things to our Dad and to my mom that I regret terribly. I have hurt their feelings countless times. It isn’t worth it. Don’t dish s—tty things right back at them. Don’t say things out of anger. You will get extremely annoyed with your parents. TRUST ME. Parents are cray cray and sometimes you want to just put a muzzle on it. BUT they don’t make muzzles for parents and again, it just isn’t worth it. Just say you’re sorry and leave it at that.”
Ireland was famously the target of her father’s temper during a particularly rough time between him and Basinger, when he left a voicemail calling his then 11-year-old daughter a “rude, thoughtless little pig”—and the tape was subsequently leaked online.
The new big sister warns Carmen that she “grew up way too fast” and advises her to enjoy her childhood and teenage years. Ireland, promising to always be her gym buddy, also tells her little sis to “enjoy your pizza parties and your Starbucks” and not obsess about her outward appearance.
“Just remember, the happiest girl in the room is the prettiest girl. By projecting your inner beauty, you will shine,” Ireland writes.
