Multinational companies Haqqani Network, Jaish-e-Mohammed registered under Asset Declaration Scheme

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(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)

ISLAMABAD – Multinational companies Haqqani Network and Jaish-e-Mohammed (JeM) have finally been registered by their owners as part of the Asset Declaration Scheme, The Dependent has reliably learnt.

Inspired by Prime Minister Imran Khan’s speech, the owner of the Haqqani Network and JeM on Thursday morning decided to list both firms as their properties.

Sources close to the development confirm that the registration of similar companies like the Lashkar-e-Taiba, Afghan Taliban, Hizb-ul-Mujahideen and Lashkar-e-Jhangvi is expected to follow suit.

“The registration document for the Haqqani Network and JeM reveals that all other similar multinational and domestic firms might be owned by the same group as well,” said a well-placed source from the Interior Ministry.

Both Haqqani Network and JeM are renowned global brands with their headquarters in Pakistan. Their work spans over South Asia, with the Haqqani Network especially active along the Af-Pak border, with JeM focusing on the uplift of Kashmir.

Given that the owners are Pakistanis, and the companies function from within the country, it was crucial that they be registered in Pakistan.

In May, the Pakistan Tehreek-i-Insaf government had announced the Asset Declaration Scheme — for whitening of undisclosed assets, including foreign assets.

“Our assets were, are and will always be white. We are just getting them registered to convey that these are the names that are the current names of our countries. The names will change as per business requirement and operational needs,” a spokesperson of the owner of Haqqani Network and JeM told The Dependent.