(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)
With the latest poll numbers indicating towards a stagnation in most and a drop in popularity in some of the ruling party’s key constituencies, PTI has decided to reinvent its image starting with replacing its trademark motto of ‘Naya Pakistan’ with ‘Watch Till End’.
An internal circular titled “Naya naara eik nayi PTI kei liye” available with The Dependent explains that the new motto has been framed after extensive focus group testing and research by the best in the business primarily aimed at retaining “those bed-wetting pansies that make up the party’s core base who are contemplating jumping ship”.
“The versatility of ‘Watch till end’ is simply unmatched! Just look at how much time people will spend waiting for that tree to fall in a prank video on a loop; it just doesn’t fall. Or for that matter sitting through the collection of those amazing bottlecap challenge videos with the fat guy who falls with his pants down at the end”, commented Faisal Vawda on the change, chuckling, unbeknownst to him how he had drawn some excellent analogies, also completely missing the irony in the process.
To a question regarding the sizeable chunk of voters – as pointed out in the recent polls – who had decided not vote for PTI in the next general elections, Special Assistant to the Prime Minister of Pakistan Imran Khan on Political Affairs Naeemul Haque simply replied, “wohh ho jayega”.