Shahid Khaqan Abbasi taken into custody after Liaquat Ali Khan’s killer discovered in car


(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)



Former Prime Minister Shahid Khaqan Abbasi was taken into custody late Wednesday when the killer of former PM Liaquat Ali Khan was recovered from the trunk of his car.

“After a tip-off, we intercepted the former PM’s vehicle,” said FIA Assistant Director Saleem Hassan. “And while checking the trunk, we recovered Said Akbar Babrak from there.”

“This confirms the longstanding suspicion that Shahid Khaqan Abbasi was, indeed, behind the assassination of Pakistan’s first PM,” he continued.

Advisor to the PM on Information and Broadcasting Firdous Ashiq Awan said that the possibility of the involvement of other key members of the Pakistan Muslim League (Nawaz) in the said assassination.

When contacted, Abbasi said was emphatic in his denials.

“After failing to implicate me in the LNG case, the government is now doing thi….” he said while being taken to the lock-up when the press was prevented from speaking to him any further. 

“In which country is the accused killer of a former PM allowed to speak to the press,” asked plainclothed officials from the reporters.