PM to form additional high powered commission to probe salaried middle class


(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)

Prime Minister Imran Khan on Tuesday promised to constitute a “high-powered commission” to probe the nation’s salaried middle class.

Khan, during his address with the nation late Tuesday, took the masses into confidence on current political and economic situation of the country.

“Now, I will go after them … (the middle class) and take them to task,” he said. “I will make them answerable, and I will not spare them even at the cost of my life,” Imran Khan said.

The country’s salaried middle-class, meanwhile, were non-plussed by this sudden anger towards them.

“Many of us have even voted for the man. At least I did,” said Saleem Hassan, an Islamabad-based banker. “What’s this guy’s problem?”

Meanwhile, the cabinet division has approved a Rs 7.5 billion plan to expand the various detention facilities of the NAB, where salaried middle-class individuals could be probed.

“This is going to mean long hours at the office,” said an investigation officer at NAB on the condition of anonymity.

“So I won’t be able to teach those neighbourhood math tuitions anymore that I used to after office timings. Needed them to make ends meet. Very little salary left at the end of the month these days.”