PML-N beats NAB in first round of Tilo Express

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(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)

LAHORE – Vice Captain Hamza Shahbaz made the decisive play in clutch time as Pakistan Muslim League-Nawaz (PML-N) beat the National Accountability Bureau (NAB) in the first round of Tilo Express on Saturday.

While the NAB went for the Decision Review System (DRS) for the crucial play, the Lahore High Court (LHC) ruled in the PML-N’s favour, confirming that their Vice Captain Hamza Shehbaz had indeed touched the NAB team and shouted Tilo, before Express had been shouted by the opponents.

Once the DRS ruled in the PML-N’s favour, the hordes of fans gathered outside the LHC started sloganeering.

Justice Malik Shahzad Ahmad Khan, taking note of the large gathering, remarked: “So many people have been called here today. What is all this?”

Vice Captain Hamza Shahbaz replied that he had not called the PML-N fans.

“You have only won the first match, what will happen in the future if such sloganeering has already begun?” Justice Mirza Waqas Rauf asked.

Analysts laud Hamza’s performance in the matchup given that the burden of his team lay on his shoulders in the absence of Captain Shehbaz Sharif with Head Coach Nawaz Sharif not present in the dugout either.

“The fact that Tilo Express is being played shows that the home team has decided to return to the style of 90s,” prominent expert Mirza Iqbal Baig said while talking to The Dependent. “It might become problematic if the two teams decide to play Pithoo Garam.”

Hamza Shahbaz conjured the play of the match in the dying moments of the game when he jumped on the ladder in the playground which gave him the angle to making the winning play.

The second round of Tilo Express is scheduled for April 17.