Why such leniency to Abhinandan, asks Ehsanullah Ehsan

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(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)

Noted patriot and public intellectual Ehsanullah Ehsan said on Friday that the government should not have let captured Indian Airforce pilot Abhinandan Varthaman so easily.

“I understand that we want to show bigger hearts here,” he said, speaking to The Dependent from a state guest house. “But what message, really, is this sending our civilians and even the enemies of our country?”

“He wasn’t here for a joyride,” he said passionately.

“He was here with the express intention of inflicting violence. And what did we do to him? After knocking him down, first we protected him from a patriotic mob that was going to do its national duty. Then, we take him to a safe location and give him tea.”

“Are we going to be so lax about someone who has been waging war against our great nation,” he asked passionately.

“Send him back, sure. But not so soon. Not without him paying a price.”