(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)
A team of anthropologists from the Quaid-e-Azam University in Islamabad have made contact with a tribe of remote, cut off tribe that still practised the ancient ritual of thanking Raheel Shareef.
“We were completely taken aback by how incredibly cut off they were from the modern world,” said Dr Basheer Ahmed, team leader of the expedition. “That they would be so unaware of the recent developments in the world.”
“This puts in front of us a problem that many anthropologists have faced since long: whether we should try to reform them and bring them up to date with the ways of the modern world, or to let them remain at their ancient ways, practising outdated rituals.”
“There is a quaint beauty to old rituals, I agree. Much like an indigenous North American rain dance, it does not yield any results, but the important thing for these people is to keep believing in the effectiveness of the rituals, though it clearly, clearly doesn’t have any effect anymore.”
“But, having thought about it quite a bit, we would like to go ahead and inform them of the new ways of the world,” he concluded.