(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer)
In a move that has shocked his fanbase, Dr Shahid Masood has declared he will resign if the world does not end in 2018.
“If the world does not end in 2019, and I mean really end, I promise I will leave my post at whatever channel I am employed by near the end of the year” read an official statement released by the Doctor’s office.
Dr Masood has been a veteran television commentator, and became infamous for his series about the end of time. However, none of his many predictions as to the approaching final days of the world have come true.
The announcement has left the Pakistani commentariat shaking with tremors as the world waits and watches whether this will be Dr Masood’s last year on TV.
The announcement comes after a tough year for Shahid Masood, who was in trouble with the courts over claims he made on his television show that turned out to be completely falsified and plucked out of thin air. Some have said that the drastic statement may be an attempt to restore his reputation, which had barely existed as it is.
“Yes there was that whole fiasco. And the entire country suffered for the 90 days that I was off air. But here I am again, and this time with a truly dhamaka revelation” he said speaking to The Dependent.
“No I think this announcement will be very well recieved. I mean, its the end of the world, sure, but it’ll do wonders for my credibility,” he added.
Meanwhile, while many have been assuming that the statement came because Dr Masood was losing trust in his own abilities, he insisted to The Dependent that his wager was one of confidence, not frustration.
“Oh it is totally going to happen this year. Trust me, I’m an expert”
“When have I ever been wrong” he asked.