Seven ways to beat the winter blues in smog stricken Lahore

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It is a truth universally acknowledged that winters are hard. The days are shorter and darker, and the human gear in capitalist machinery is at risk of malfunctioning (and also at risk of questioning the absurdity of the social order). Additionally, the smog isn’t only a material reality, it can settle over productivity as well.

To help all those like us who find it harder to leave the house during winter, we have a few tips to deal with this existential predicament.

Stay in bed

No, honestly, until the moment you have to go to school or work, eat in bed, read in bed and sleep in bed, of course. Stock up on junk food (you can feel guilty during the summer) and binge watch a new show on Netflix. Ignore the deadlines if they are more than two weeks away.

Explore some new shayari

It’s pretty ‘cool’ these days thanks to Instagram and Tumblr. You can try your hand at some too.

Drink water

A lot of water. (Honestly, we are not very sure as to how effective it is, but it is mentioned in like every self-help article ever so it must be sound advice). However, make sure that you are always within reach of a toilet.

Throw caution to your health

Go to Liberty or G-1 market or your local food spot on days that the smog settles down. Buy the ganday wale chips slathered with ‘ketchup’ made out of food colouring and artificial flavouring. Nothing tastes as good as that. Just make sure you get them dusted with chaat masala and take a Panadol for emphasis.

Purge your playlist

Curate a new playlist for those nighttime walks that warrant deep thoughts. Just stay away from Radiohead or Mount Eerie unless you want your bleeding heart to drip all over the place.

Friends

Not the TV series though we have no problem if you don’t find the show problematic. Try to get them to come over and bond over sob stories. There’s no one better to finish a pan of brownies with.

Political correctness

Plot a social revolution from the comfort of your bed. It comes at no personal discomfort and you can pat yourself at the back for political correctness.