‘Make Pakistan grate again’ – Steve Bannon claims credit for election triumph of ‘ideological ally’ Imran Khan


(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)

ROME – Disgraced former US Presidential Adviser and an award-winning windbag, Steve Bannon claimed the electoral victory of Prime Minister Imran Khan as his accomplishment.

Talking to the The Dependent, Mr. Bannon gloated his access to PM Imran Khan, whom he counts among ‘ideological allies’.

“This is just the latest example of where we tapped into talent and transformed raw skill into a popular populist success story,” he said.

Mr. Bannon wants to make Pakistan grate again and Imran Khan has played the role of a puppet in this international conspiracy against cheese, he maintains.

Readers would remember the recent news about a tax on imported cheese that was supposed to be part of the ‘mini-budget’.

“Yeh cheese! Together we will make Pakistan grate again,” Mr Bannon had exclaimed in the aftermath of the July 25, close aides confirm.

It is no coincidence that Mr. Bannon is currently based in Italy, the home of Pizza and a major producer and exporter of cheese.

The Dependent wants to register our protests against this grotesque scheme against the sovereignty and well-being of Pakistani consumers of good cheese.