Jaani WTF, asks Imran Khan over secure line


(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)

While expressing concern over the release of former prime minister Nawaz Sharif, his daughter Maryam Nawaz and son-in-law Capt (retd) Safdar, Prime Minister Imran Khan enquired “Jaani, WTF?” over a secure line.


The three were released after the Islamabad High Court suspended the sentence of a NAB court that had convicted them in the Avenfield properties case.


“Jaani, WTF,” he asked again of the individual on the other end of the secure line, who did not seem to be as responsive as Khan wanted.


“Why won’t you say something, tell me,” screamed the prime minister, visibly emotional, while speaking on the balcony of the state guest house in Jeddah. “Why don’t you say something, DAMNIT!”


After the person on the other end of the line gave his reply, Khan’s tone immediately changed. “I’m sorry. No, I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean it,” he said, with tears in his eyes. “Sorry, yes, I know I can’t talk to you like that, I’m sorry.”


“Are you mad at me? Please don’t be mad at me.”