Shan Masood neither a bowler nor a professor, argues dejected Hafeez


(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)

LAHORE – The exclusion from national cricket team’s squad for the Asia Cup has left all-rounder Mohammad Hafeez in a spin when he was yet to forget the Pakistan Cricket Board’s (PCB) earlier move of demoting him from Category A to B in their list of centrally contracted players.

Speaking to the media, Hafeez slammed the board for “ignoring a blistering batsman who helped the team win ICC Champions Trophy final through quick-fire knock,” while not referring to Fakhar Zaman, who was picked in the 16-man squad.

“Shan Masood is a talented batsman, no doubt. But he can’t bowl as compared to someone who can get left-handed openers out in the early overs. And I am not talking about Muhammad Amir who has also been picked.”

“And he certainly cannot perform the role of a professor who has to maneuver his players, make spontaneous changes and build confidence among the young talents,” Hafeez said, while being interrupted by a report who asked, “Isn’t it the skipper’s role to do all this?”

The 37-year-old took a pause and went on to say, “I will be a suitable player for the UAE conditions. I am still up for grabs to whom it may concern.”

On the other hand, the left-handed batsman who replaced Hafeez in the squad, Shan Masood, has geared up to impress his critics in the Asia Cup.

“My haters will surely consider changing their mind after seeing my performance. I will focus on my game even if it is to be played on the benches,” he told reporters.