(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)
ISLAMABAD – A multi-party conference (MPC) called to devise a joint strategy over alleged rigging in the 2018 general elections on Friday rejected the results of the poll, while simultaneously accepting it, and decided to both protest and play their role as a strong opposition.
This was made possible after reaching consensus over the fact that unlike their predecessors, the parties’ representatives would being durable containers inside the Parliament and not outside it, helping form a strong opposition.
Attended by leaders of various parties, the MPC was chaired by PML-N president Shahbaz Sharif and Muttahida Majlis-i-Amal (MMA) president Maulana Fazlur Rehman, under whom it was agreed that the parties would simultaneously reject the election that took place on Wednesday, and accept it because they would eventually have to.
The MPC also maintained that it is collectively demanding a reelection, and reiterated that it would be okay if it the re-polling did not take place.
Keeping up with the trend, a local independent commission designed to inspect the election also revealed the result that the polls were both rigged and not rigged simultaneously.
Independent observers and analysts have lauded and condemned the elections, saying that they would strengthen and weaken democracy in the country.