Local electable wishing his existence weren’t limited to single label

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(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)

SOMEWHERE IN SOUTH PUNJAB – Local electable Sher Billa* who over the next few days will brace himself for a resounding triumph in the upcoming election, on Friday evening was found wishing that his entire existence weren’t limited to a single label.

Talking to himself in a rare moment of solitude amidst the hustle and bustle of life – political and otherwise – Mr Billa expressed his concerns about how he is being continuously limited to a reductive and derogatory label.

“Nobody wants to know what my favourite colour is, or which movie I like the most, or the kind of music I want to listen to,” Mr Billa told himself, reliable sources privy to the voices in his head, have informed The Dependent.

“Nobody really is interested in me. They are just interested in the electable inside me. Even though that only forms a fraction of who I really am,” Mr Billa added.

Expressing further concern, a visibly freaked out Mr Billa convinced himself that unless he does something about it, things might get out of hand.

“Yesterday, my wife addressed me as ‘oye electable’. You really need to do something about this soon,” Mr Billa told himself.

*The name has been changed to protect the identity