Dubai apartment building council disqualifies Musharraf from residential complex elections


(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)

DUBAI – Former military ruler of Pakistan and resident of Dubai’s South Ridge Tower 6 Downtown Gen (R) Pervez Musharraf on Wednesday was disqualified by his building’s council from contesting the upcoming residential complex elections, The Dependent has learnt.

Musharraf, who had filed his nomination papers for the community council elections, was disqualified after it was discovered that he did not fulfill the criteria for council membership.

“We are very strict when it comes to election eligibility,” South Ridge Tower 6 council member Shams Ahmed said while talking to The Dependent. “And Mr Musharraf has clearly fallen short of that.”

The former military dictator of Pakistan under trial for treason, breaching the constitution, murder of a former prime minister, removal of judges, in Pakistan, was declared ineligible by the South Ridge Tower 6 council committee for being a ‘bad neighbor’.

“He hardly ever participates in any community events,” said next door neighbour Shilpa Tiwari. “Plus the TV volume at his place is always so loud – especially when he is listening to his own interviews, which, considering that similar noise is already heard from his apartment before they air, are clearly scripted.”

Another neighbour Hamd bin Qasim said Musharraf was a bad influence on children as well.

“We’re living in an age where we’re discouraging children from playing with toy guns,” he told The Dependent. “So it’s really disturbing when a 75-year-man owns and plays with toy guns in the building.”