Security forces seize deadly shipment of Pashteen caps headed for Lahore


(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)

LAHORE: Security forces on Tuesday seized a deadly shipment of Mazari caps, also referred to by their street name as Pashteen caps, headed to Lahore.

“After being tipped off, we seized this shipment from a truck on GT Road, near Lala Musa,” said SSP Saleem Bhatti, of the Counter-terror Department, Punjab Police.

“The shipment was hidden behind vegetables.”

“God knows what might have happened had they reached their destination,” he added.

“They had a massive payload.”

Earlier, the Director General of the Inter Services Public Relations (ISPR) Maj Gen Ghafoor Ahmed had revealed to the public how the Pashteen caps were being imported from outside the country by the miscreant elements.

In the same press conference, Ghafoor also pointed out the duplicitous nature of Manzoor Pashteen, the charismatic leader of the miscreant group, who went by Manzoor Mehsud till recently but now calls himself Manzoor Pashteen, which is how the word Pashtun is pronounced in the Mehsud dialect