(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)
ISLAMABAD – Ousted Prime Minister and former president of the ruling Pakistan Muslim League-Nawaz (PML-N) will organise a rally against the Pakistani judiciary and military establishment if Australian captain Steve Smith isn’t disqualified for life after confessing to ball tampering during the Cape Town Test match.
Sources within the PML-N have told The Dependent that the preparations for the rally are complete and that Nawaz Sharif is just awaiting the verdict on the Australian ball tampering scandal.
“I’m going to highlight the double standards of the judiciary and the establishment that has been doing this for the past 70 years,” Nawaz Sharif told a close aide, The Dependent has learnt.
“If I can be disqualified for what I didn’t do in Panama, the Australians should be disqualified for what the world saw them doing in their pajama,” Nawaz added.
Sources have further confirmed that the speech has also been prepared once the expected verdict is released that the Australian captain will not be disqualified for life.
“Look at this laadla,” begins an excerpt from the speech available in its entirety with The Dependent. “They won’t do anything to this laadla. Why don’t you put the ball tampering on me as well, Supreme Court judges!”