Mental and psychological issue treatments are avoided in our society. First, afflicted and their families are in denial of the disorder. There is lack of understanding regarding their illness. They do not genuinely understand they need help. Their family too, does not realize this is an issue that requires address. When people and their families deny stresses and illnesses they refuse to seek medical help for the same. Sometimes, people do realize an issue but not its magnanimity. They feel it is “a phase” that will get resolved in due course of time. Many feel accepting a problem reflects inability to handle an issue on their own.
Second, treatment of these illnesses for most carry a social stigma. People feel shame and fear discrimination by members of society. They do not want to be labeled in a category of those “crazy.”
There is also distrust in revealing a very personal problem to a doctor. Developing a position of trust takes time. It takes many sessions to understand what’s going wrong. The medication takes time to take effect. Usually two to three weeks before effects start kicking in. Though not every situation requires medication. In many cases the psychologist help is adequate. In many others, whereas psychiatrist monitors progress and medication regular sessions by a psychologist are required. It is team work with a strong family support.
Not knowing where to seek help or financial barriers in paying for it are other possible barriers that may delay treatment causing complications.
There can be so many reasons for the stress. “Pain, sorrows, partings, grief all are part of human life. Inescapable and may occur at any age. What matters is not what the hurt was, but how we dealt with it and overcame it to become stronger than before or let ourselves drown in it. Posttraumatic growth can take place after trauma only if we look within, forgive ourselves,” says Dr Ayza Yazdani Abid, psychologist and EMDR Therapist in Islamabad.
There are different kinds of traumas. Wife beating, physical abuse by male head of the house of both wife and children resulting in low self-esteem of family members. Sexual abuse of wives, severe low image treatment by spouse can lead to trauma. A trauma that goes unrecognized as the victims suffers in silence through their lives. Abuse by spouse is rarely, unless in extreme cases, recognized as abuse in the Pakistani society.
Marriage at a young age, marriage with inadequate dowries, disallowing women to marry outside their clan to control their inheritance are all different kinds of abuses leasing to victim stress.
This does not mean men do not suffer. Young boys who view their father abusing their mother at different levels are damaged enough to have a normal relationship in their adulthood and more likely to repeat the pattern of his parents’ marriage.
Young boys forced to adopt the profession of the family they do not wish to or do not have an aptitude for, suppress anger and suffer from inadequacy that warps their relationships.
Setting a high bar of excellence for an off spring that his or her sibling has achieved to create rivalry to achieve excellence is a bad approach. The level expected may or not be achieved but hatred and anger towards the excelling sibling will certainly be achieved.
Peer pressure in school with the younger ones become susceptible to drug abuse is part of the new culture.
More and more, children hailing from affluent families going to boutique schools mainly in posh residential areas are falling victim to drug use. It starts usually with a few kids with too much money to spend given to them, a car, and parents who simply do not know where and with whom their children are spending their time with. From a small clique the intake of drugs spreads to their friends in school. It starts as adventurism, soon becomes an addiction, usual drug among young users being hash since it’s cheaper.
Most parents ignore this as a ‘phase’ leading to multidimensional physical and mental disorders in their children. If untreated symptoms of drug abuse can bloom into something worse and long term in nature.
Trauma of loss of a parent, especially at a tender age can cause stress in the young. The young widow is left sometimes with financial support at other times without and in both cases she realizes the larger part of the society relegates her to a lower level than an unhappily or happily married woman. Same applies to a divorcee, and/or an unmarried woman. The attitude has to be felt only if one steps in her shoes. This creates in some fear, in some anger, in some sadness and in many a combination of two or more.
The repercussions of a mother or a father lost at many levels destroys a family and causes different kinds of traumas to different members they are supposed to grapple with on their own.
Unfortunately, all these and so many other traumas go unaddressed and simply brushed under the carpet. An awareness campaign by the relevant forums is needed. Badly!
