Our Pakistan Correspondent
The Facebook community called DefEnDers of PAkIsTan announced on Saturday its commitment to the cause of winning the 1971 war on Facebook.
“Yes, many would argue that we did indeed lose the way in the real world,” said Sargodha Prynce, admin of the community, “But I feel that we have it in us to win the war on Facebook, at least.”
“We will bomb our Indian — and shameless Pakistani — opponents who say that Pakistan lost that war with all-caps ‘screamers’ saying how we actually defended the real Pakistan i.e. West Pakistan against the all-out Indian assault that they had started after no provocation whatsoever.”
“Since we managed to protect the actual Pakistan, we can say that we won the 1971 war,” he continued.
“When they bring up the issue of 90,000 prisoners, we will scream back ‘what about 90,000 rapes in Delhi daily?’” said Shumaila Hassan, citing an incorrect statistic which, furthermore, doesn’t have anything to do with the issue at hand.
“We will also cite how our nuclear weapons reach centigrades much higher than the temperatures reached by the Indian weapons,” continued Hassan, citing another factoid that was a) not true b) did not make any difference whatsoever even if it were true and c) still had no bearing on the fact that Pakistan lost the 1971 war with India.
“InshAllah, we will win the war on Facebook.”