The private life of a great president
Like all men, Gamal Abdel Nasser, too, was a man of flesh and blood but through his words and deeds, he showed that he was more than a man. Like all self-respecting people, he too valued liberty, not only for his self, fellow countrymen but for all the Arabs. Nasser was not just the president of Egypt; he was the hero of the Arabs. When the Egyptians groaned under the yoke of the Anglo-French imperialism in the post-World War II era, he had the guts to assert Arab independence by nationalising the Suez Canal and when the British, the French and the Israelis jointly attacked Egypt to snatch back Suez, he defeated them, single-handedly.
He gave the Arabs a reason to be proud of, for which they loved him. So high was his esteem that the Syrians came running for a union with Egypt and Gaddafi immediately rushed to him for advice after bringing a revolution in Libya. Nasser was looked upon as the fatherly figure by both the street and the elite in the Arab world. The Arab Summit in Cairo in September 1970 is a testimony when he successfully mediated to stop a civil war between Jordan’s King Hussein and Yasser Arafat’s PLO; however, my objective here is not to discuss his statesmanship but to try to sneak a peep into his private life. Discussing the private lives of public figures is often difficult due to the dearth of reliable sources, however, “Nasser—my husband” by Mrs Tahia Nasser sheds some light on the man behind the public scene.
As the first lady of Egypt, Tahia encountered several difficult situations. She had to learn English to converse with foreigners. We find out that till the mid-fifties, Egyptian women were not expected to attend state banquets
The families of Nasser and Tahia were friends and when he sent the marriage proposal through his uncle and aunt, Tahia’s brother, who was also her guardian after the death of her father, refused to consider the proposal till the marriage of her elder sister. Though Tahia liked Nasser, the family tradition only permitted her to refuse a suitor but did not allow her to choose one of her own accord. Eventually they got married; years later, Nasser jokingly told his children that “the only man in the world whose conditions I accepted was Abdel Hamid Kazem (Tahia’s brother).” Such can be the power of the brother-in-law or as they say “sari khudai aik taraf, joru ka bhai aik taraf.” There are several rare family photos in the book which show that theirs was a modern family in which the males wore trousers and shirts with ties and suits while the females wore full, half or sleeveless shirts and knee-length skirts yet Nasser did not favour mixed social interaction with friends and officers. When any of his friends visited his house with spouse, he would tell Tahia, “There is a lady in the salon, receive and entertain her until her husband’s visit is over.” During an official visit to the royal family in Greece, when as per the royal custom, the Queen of Greece tried to take Nasser’s arm while walking down the banquet hall, he told her, “I will walk beside the king and you can walk beside my wife,” and when the Queen said, “But what if I were to take your arm?,” Nasser replied, “I would be very embarrassed,” so the Queen stepped back and instead of Nasser’s, took Tahia’s arm. Before proceeding to Greece when Nasser was informed that it was customary for both the men and women to wear the evening dress for state banquets, Nasser said that he would not wear the evening dress and if the Greek government insisted on the evening dress, he would cancel the visit to which the King of Greece conveyed that he would welcome Nasser howsoever he chose to dress but the visit should not be cancelled.
Nasser was a living example of simple living and high thinking. He was much organised in managing his self and never bothered his wife for any assistance. He relaxed by watching movies, particularly the plays of Naguib al-Rihani, who performed comedy of manners about social and political issues and preferred the dinner at home than at a restaurant after the movie. Moreover, there was a piano at home and he enjoyed listening to the songs of Umme Kulsoom, who was known as the Star of the East. In addition, he liked coffee and tobacco but quit smoking on the advice of doctors in 1968. Usually, he had his breakfast in the bedroom with Tahia always by his side. There was no set time for lunch and he preferred to have a light supper consisting of white cheese, yoghurt and fruit. The president always carried a small Quran in a white metal box in his pocket. Once while going out in a hurry, he could not find it so Tahia gave him another small Quran with a cardboard cover but when he was at the exit door, she found his original Quran and from that day till his death, Nasser kept two Qurans in his pockets.
One reason why there are so many family photos in the book is because Nasser liked both still photography and movie-making so much so that he had gifted a regular and a movie camera to each of his children. Children are the dearest possessions of parents and Nasser always celebrated their birthdays and was never unduly strict with them, taking time out to see their progress reports making comparison with the performance in the past months. He believed that transmitting knowledge to the children was the greatest legacy of the parents. When his eldest daughter Hoda expressed the desire to marry a man of her choice, Nasser readily agreed saying “I want my daughters to choose the men they wish to marry” and added, “I have received many requests for their hands in marriage from sons of wealthy businessmen and former pashas, but I have always refused.” We also find out that Nasser’s family belonged to Upper Egypt who traditionally did not believe in any engagement period rather held the marriage ceremony straightaway after accepting the proposal. He was equally encouraging to his sons in their educational pursuits and promised his son Abdel Hakim a gift of his choice if he scored 80 percent marks in his final examinations. The son scored 84 percent and when Nasser asked him what gift he would like to have, the son desired a visit to London to which the father replied, “You want to go to London while your brothers are fighting in the heat at the front? When we have rid our country of the Israelis, then you can go to London or even to Tokyo if you wish,” and gifted him a motorcycle.
Tahia fondly remembers her wedlock of over twenty-six years with Nasser. The couple lived in ordinary houses because Nasser disliked palatial mansions. The salary was just enough for sustenance. He bought an Austin from savings saved from the months of fighting against the Israelis because the soldiers in action at the front were paid double salaries. The family photos also reveal that theirs was a happy family as Nasser was a family man who found joy and solace among his family members, however, after he heralded the revolution in Egypt, he could find little or no time for his wife and children so much so that the husband and wife could not go together to an outing for six years.
The families of Nasser and Tahia were friends and when he sent the marriage proposal through his uncle and aunt, Tahia’s brother, who was also her guardian after the death of her father, refused to consider the proposal till the marriage of her elder sister
As the first lady of Egypt, Tahia encountered several difficult situations. She had to learn English to converse with foreigners. We find out that till the mid-fifties, Egyptian women were not expected to attend state banquets. Despite this she had to arrange a banquet for the wife of Yugoslav President Tito as well as the accompanying women delegates and the wives of the Egyptian ministers. And there were some embarrassing moments as well when on her first state visit to Yugoslavia, instead of shaking hands with President Tito whom she did not recognise; she first shook hands with maitre d’hotel. While attending her first state dinner hosted in honour of Emperor Haile Selassie of Ethiopia in Cairo, she almost fainted due to quickening of heartbeat and had a similar uneasy feeling at another dinner with the Indian Premier Nehru which the doctors diagnosed as nothing serious, just a case of rattled nerves.
The relationship between husband and wife is usually complex. It is said that “The trouble with wedlock is that there’s not enough wed and too much lock,” or in a successful marriage “A good husband should be deaf and a good wife blind,” that does not seem to be the situation with the Nassers because both were a happy and successful couple. Tahia’s only wish after Nasser’s death was to be buried by his side and a resting place has been prepared for her. I searched the book to find the key to their happy marriage and in the maze of the text she revealed it in one sentence: “I happily complied with Gamal’s instructions at all times, fully convinced of his opinions.” Some women, particularly the feminists may not like this, and they are within their right to do so but Tahia, too, is a modern and educated woman, who remembers her dead husband after a passage of over four decades in these memorable words: “He is Gamal Abdel Nasser, who lived a great man, and he is now in God’s care; his history alone bears witness to him.” There can’t be a better tribute to a dead husband from a loving wife.