T20 Cricket and Pakistan’s Neville Chamberlains

Send them a team of cows

Neville Chamberlain, Britain’s Prime Minister till 1940, is one of the most pilloried figures in British politics, because of the Munich Agreement signed by Hitler — Peace with Honor as he called it. To his credit Chamberlain did return with the Munich Agreement — admittedly one that was not worth the paper it was written on. When Hitler reneged on his word, rather than accept German supremacy Britain went to war with Germany, at great human and financial cost. Needless to say Chamberlain had to resign.

This simple point seems to be lost on our Pakistan Cricket Board (PCB) — namely that you can only have an agreement on a cricket series if both sides at the table value the concept of equity and justice. The PCB leading lights, after their numerous meetings and supplications with the Board of Cricket Control India (BCCI) for a cricket series between Pakistan and India, had returned with – well, with at best a vague promise. Sources say that after shaking BCCI President Shashank Manohar’s proffered hand, the Pakistanis were informed that if the ducks flew low over the Indus flyaway and the trade winds from the east blew strong then maybe, just maybe, India might hold a cricket series with Pakistan. Well guess what? The ducks flew high and the series with India never materialised. I am glad that finally our PCB has woken up and asked questions about the security of our players.

Everyone knew that the Indians would never agree to a series given the discriminatory way in which they have treated anything to do with Pakistani sporting events, including barring Pakistani cricketers from participating in the Indian Premier League, the Indian lobby opposed every Pakistani nominee for ICC Player of the Year Award, and not least the treatment of Aleem Dar, a former ICC umpire of the year, who was summarily asked to leave. This discriminatory and racist attitude by the ICC goes against its own rules — as the only reason for asking him to leave was the colour of his passport not his ability as an umpire.

In case of any threats the ICC was bound to stand by its nominee and ask for reassigning the ground, instead it requested the good empire to depart. Yet neither our foreign office nor PCB muttered a word of protest. One can only imagine the brouhaha had the boot been on the other foot and the same treatment handed out to an Indian umpire in Pakistan — we would have had Indian media calling for nuclear retaliation.

Whoever from the PCB signed on the dotted line to give control to the big three should be asked some tough questions. By agreeing to this arrangement not only did we lose our voice in the ICC, but also knifed in the back the cricket boards of South Africa, Sri Lanka and others who opposed those changes. Now the chickens have come home to roost big time and unlike any other international sporting body where the concept of one person one vote still holds good, the Pakistan Cricket Board and others are at the mercy of the big three, particularly the BCCI, without understanding that unlike a contract legally a Memorandum of Understanding is not enforceable. This must change, and since no one gives up power voluntarily, Pakistan on a point of principal must coordinate with other country cricket boards and struggle to change these laws.

If the performance of PCB’s head honchos in India was at best puzzling, their hope of any mediation by ICC’s imperious Giles Clarke was even sadder even though every person and his dog knew that nothing would come of it without blessing from the Indian government.

Shahryar Khan and NajamSethi are both decent and well-meaning professionals, of that there can never be any doubt. Outside of cricket both have distinguished themselves in their respective professions, but in the end there must be consequences and a plan to redeem the country’s position after PCB was led down the proverbial garden path by BCCI and Indian government’s chicanery under the ruse of kowtowing to Hindu nationalism.

Given the Indian governments’ lack of confidence in providing adequate security to visiting Pakistani sportsmen, singers, officials, or players even for international events such as the recent Kabbadi matches, as well as Pakistani umpires on the ICC elite panel, Pakistan must announce its inability to send its team to or play with India and discourage all Pakistanis from attending any event in India.

Instead, for forthcoming cricketing events in India Pakistan should send a team of twelve cows; for batting cows — five Sahiwals, for bowling cows — five Red Sindhis, while the wicket keeper/captain and the twelfth cow should be of the Tharparkar breed. With a yield of 1,800 liters of milk per lactation the Tharparker cows may not be as productive as the former two breeds, but I understand they are good to have in a crisis. After all safety and security of the participants is of paramount importance. In today’s India security of Muslims or Pakistanis may not be guaranteed, but we all know what happens to anyone there who tries to harm cows.