Worrying about small things is good, for in small things lie answers to big questions
“I know you have been asked this so many times that you must have been driven up the wall Humayun,” began Maverick, “but where do you see Pakistan going?”
“Et tu, Maverick? Show me the nearest wall,” I said jokingly, “though at my age and weight it’s a small mercy that I can even climb up my bed, forget a wall, any wall. Seriously, Maverick, I see us going in the right direction.”
“What?” said Maverick perplexed. “But I’d love to see you climb up a wall anyway.” Maverick broke into what passes for a grin on his hairy face. “Why, there could be something in it for me too; I could sell tickets to see you trying to climb up a wall at our next Annual Monkey Fair.”
“I would be the first to buy one,” said I. “Sticks and stones may break my bones but insults don’t hurt me anymore as the Rajput in me has mellowed with age. My response is to pray for the guys who do and try and remember that we are all victims of our circumstances. Maverick, why don’t you try your hand at something I do, like writing an international bestseller? Like ghost writing my autobiography, for instance?”
“Now you’re making fun of me,” said Maverick.
“I’m just teasing you, that’s all. We should try and stick to things we are good at. If you try and be everything to all men and women you only come a cropper.”
“That’s true. Men try and impress women more than they do men. It’s the same with us monkeys. It’s the same with all species in every genus.”
“Good you understand. So before you waste more time on the facetious, yes, you are right: I’ve answered this question many times. But I don’t mind being asked again and again because I am sensitive to how frustrated and worried people are. Many are angry, which is a good thing because anger is the raw material of revolution and in revolution lies salvation. In fact, anger leading to revolution is equal to salvation. Revolution doesn’t necessarily mean death and destruction. It means a change of status quo, of modes of ownership, production and more equitable distribution of wealth, benefits and income so that there’s enough in it for everyone. Right now there isn’t and given how people see profligacy and waste on wrong priorities while children die of hunger and disease and nearly half our population lives below the poverty line, any wonder that people are getting increasingly angry. Remember: Anger Begets Revolution; Revolution Begets Salvation.”
How does it matter whether we play cricket with India or not? Yet our cricket bosses go to Bombay on a dubious invitation and after returning home humiliated are not even on the same page
“Yes, but you still haven’t told me how we are going in the right direction,” asked Maverick getting back to the point.
“I thought I had. We are going in the right direction because we are hurtling towards the destruction of our system. That happens best with revolution; hardly ever by the common sense of our ruling classes. And remember, a coup is not a revolution; actually it comes to save and consolidate the system and status quo ruined by politicians. But in a short while the army brings back the same politicians without accountability, cleansing and vital structural changes in the system. We call ourselves an Islamic State but forget that Islam requires us to choose from amongst the best. But how can we when our system forces us to choose from amongst the worst because it only presents us the worst to choose from. So even if we choose the least bad, he or she is still from amongst the worst, like if you choose the best from amongst ten donkeys you will still choose a donkey, not a thoroughbred horse. People are beginning to understand this. We need a system that ensures that as far as possible those who contest elections are from amongst the best. I will go no further – yet.”
“I get your drift, but if wishes were horses…”
“Not wishes, Maverick, donkeys. If donkeys were horses.”
“And what are the small things we worry about?” asked Maverick.
“They’re all around and over you. How does it matter whether we play cricket with India or not? Yet our cricket bosses go to Bombay on a dubious invitation and after returning home humiliated are not even on the same page, one contradicting the other about what happened. The Hindu fascist terrorist Shiv Sena, which is the militant wing of the Hindu fascist terrorist BJP, while both are ideological affiliates of the Hindu fascist terrorist RSS, attacked the Indian cricket board office to stop the meeting. It’s like the USA hankering after playing baseball with al Qaeda. That’s beyond funny. The Shiv Sena won’t let our singers and actors perform there; even try and stop the launch of our former Foreign Minister Khurshid Kasuri’s book by throwing black paint on the host. But the launch was held anyway, which was a small victory. What is the point though? Actually, all cricket-playing countries minus the ‘Big Three’ – India, Australia and England – should form a new ‘Independent Cricket Council’ and give a much-needed kick in the pants of the so-called ‘International Cricket Council’ which is international no more. Yet our cricket administrators keep chasing India shamelessly and humiliate us in the process. Our cricket board chairman is a good man with a good diplomatic record, but he is now too old. The slap on his wrist by the prime minister who is patron of the Board is a good opportunity for the chairman to resign and salvage what is left of his reputation.
“India seems to have gone bonkers. Someone from India called our Sindh Governor’s House and threatened to blow it up. Then another person from the Indian foreign ministry called and threatened the president of Pakistan’s office to face dire consequences. Our foreign office lamely said that the call was made erroneously. How ‘erroneous’ can they get? They’ve gone off their rockers. Anyway, we should pray that Modi rules India for a long time because he is doing it more damage than China and Pakistan put together ever could. Intolerance in India is growing by leaps and bounds and it is in danger of eventually imploding again as it did in 1947.”
“Then, how does Imran Khan’s divorce matter? I know the argument that it raises questions about his judgment. Doesn’t fly Maverick. Judgment in personal life is different from judgment in public life. Mr Jinnah’s marriage and divorce were none too edifying, but no one questioned his judgment. Mr Bhutto had three wives and also fathered an illegitimate daughter, as did Imran Khan. Big deal. That’s their problem, not ours. Judgment about spouses bears little reflection on matters of state, but if we are against a guy we make a big thing of it. I am more worried about Imran’s judgment in taking so many feudal robber barons on board. It shows that he only speaks revolution without understanding it or meaning it or both when he takes targets of revolution in his party. As for me, if Imran is in pain I feel bad too because I consider him a friend. After all, we have a dog between us.”
“Good Lord, you are such a nice guy Humayun that you make me wish to puke. You are close to being foolish,” said Maverick in disgust.
“Not foolish, Maverick, ‘idealistic’, ‘romantic’: that is what I am perpetually accused of. When the country is beset with so many problems, we worry about cricket and marriages? Grow up, folks.”
“More important were the Local Government elections in parts of the Punjab and Sindh because that is where real democracy begins, bottom up, not top down, though let’s not forget that local elections are not an accurate reflection of national or even provincial political sentiment. That the PML-N, Nawaz Sharif’s ruling party in the federation and the Punjab, won most seats in the Punjab and the Zardari’s ruling party in Sindh won most seats in Sindh is a no brainer, not least due to the incumbency factor. The eye-opener is that independents won the second most seats in both provinces. It should be a wake-up call for all politicians because it shows that people are fed up of the current political parties. They are looking for an alternative and with Imran Khan’s PTI failing to provide one, they opted for independents in huge numbers. Perhaps the independents should gang up and form the ‘Independent Party’.
“That’s not a bad idea,” said Maverick, “but sorry to say, it won’t happen. The independents will soon join one party or another. They have to under the law but also power is a magnet that kills principles. You know that.”
More important were the Local Government elections in parts of the Punjab and Sindh because that is where real democracy begins, bottom up, not top down
“Don’t I, Maverick? Don’t I just? But do you see how, after such a high, disappointment with General Raheel Sharif and the army is beginning to manifest. Many are foolishly frustrated that he’s not yet done a coup. More pertinently, more are questioning why it’s taken the army so long to extend its war against terrorism, corruption and crime to the Punjab. Some are saying that perhaps the MQM and the PPP are right, that this operation targets them and Sindh only while Punjab is above accountability. It’s just the sort of feeling that arose in East Pakistan. The army should be careful lest it sows seeds of revolt and secession in Sindh. They are playing with fire. The army should either extend its operation to the Punjab fast or retreat from Sindh fast. They can’t have it both ways much longer and keep going on a wish and a prayer. Twiddling thumbs and contemplating navels on generous bellies is not an option.
“As to those who hanker after a coup, don’t they see that there’s already been half a coup? Right now we are working under a hybrid system – the army providing the clout and looking after important subjects, the civilian executive providing legitimacy with the judiciary providing confusion. Problem is, the civilian back wheel of this odd bicycle is not moving in tandem with the front army wheel. Those who think that the army is all-powerful and can do anything it wants are gravely mistaken – not in this dispensation. All they’ve done is reportedly placed one former army chief on the Exit Control List but not been able to get another off it. The only big fish arrested so far is the PPP’s Dr Asim. Other biggies, like Asif Zardari, his cronies and henchmen have escaped under the noses of the army along with their families. The official massacre of 14 innocent men, women and a baby in the womb by the Punjab Police and Sharif’s goons in Lahore is crying out for justice. Where is the army with its famous accountability? Is this because of civilian malfeasance? The army is all-powerful only if it is totally in-charge, but that eventually leads to more tears as we have repeatedly seen because generals don’t have answers to our problems: all they can do is a spit and paste job on a wreck. What’s not outside the realm of possibility is that a frustrated army might change the ‘elected’ civilian wheel with a custom-made civilian wheel, but not without the nod of the paymaster. That’s where General Raheel Sharif’s forthcoming visit to America could be important.
We need to reinvent Pakistan, but sensibly, by asking ourselves difficult questions that we have swept under the carpet. Soon I’m going to do just that – ask questions – and request you to seek answers for yourselves before trying to answer them myself. Then we will start reinventing. Peace be upon you.
