Cow-urine vending machines to make cow-urine deprivation a thing of the past, claims Modi

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    New Delhi – Our Modi Sarkar Correspondent: In a press conference regarding an ambitious government plan, Indian Prime Minister Narendra Modi unveiled a plan to install a little less than a million cow-urine vending machines across India.

    “Gunning for a 1000:1 ratio, we envision an idyllic future, where every Indian man, woman and child will have access to cow urine, during the course of the coming two decades,” he said.

    The plan was generally met with a positive yet cautious response from India’s hard-right. “It is a good plan,” said Rajesh Pandey, head of the Bajrang Dal, “but we generally tend not to see plans involving cow-urine through. It was promised earlier as well, but does everyone have access to cow urine now? No!”

    Information Minister Arun Jaitley urged the hard-right to stay to convey any misgivings in the plan, but cooperate in the larger picture i.e., cow-urine.

    “Cow-urine,” Jaitley added.

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