Greece seeks copyright revenues from anyone practising “democracy” anywhere on globe

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    Desperate times, desperate measures

    ATHENS – Our Greek Correspondent: In an aggressive move by the left-leaning government of the Syriza party, Greece has formally decided to pay for its financial problems by seeking intellectual property rights for the practice of representative government anywhere in the world.

    “We seek dues not just across international borders but also within them,” said Greek Prime Minister Alexis Tsipras. “By that, I mean that the US, say, will have to cough up royalties not just for Congress, but also for, say, the chairperson of the School Board of Illinois.”

    Democracy, a product developed by knowledge workers in the land of Ancient Greece (or, Greece, as they like to be called) is being used throughout the globe as a free, open-source product. After a somewhat buggy beta-version in 507 AD, many optional updates have been added and different versions of the product are used all over the world.

    Analysts agree that the move to monetise makes sense. “Look, it’s like Scotch for the UK and Cuban cigars for Cuba,” said Frank Smith, international trade economist and professor at Harvard University. “A captive market where no one else, for reasons of copyrights, can put up any competition.”

    “Better, in fact, because one day, someone might brew better whiskey somewhere else, but coming up with a new idea of a form of governance is going to be a tall order,” he added.

    Greek Finance Minister Euclid Tsakalotos also mentioned in a press release that if the country’s financial situation does not improve, his government might start seeking royalties on continental philosophy, mathematics and formal logic.

    The development has caused a tumult in the international comity of nations. As a part of austerity drives, several countries, including Pakistan, Bangladesh, Sri Lanka, Thailand, Afghanistan, Zimbabwe and Nigeria, have now declared martial law. As a pre-emptive measure, Pakistan has also placed a ban on the use of logic in the country.

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