Political improvised explosive devices
It was reported a few months back that American defence contractors were busy developing a drone that could fly at 10 Mach, or 10 times of sound, say about 7680 miles per hour. Now that would be a world record, unless the chosen ones transplanted in Palestine by the promise of the Lord or the stupidity of Lord Balfour have secretly beaten them to it. But in matters of sheer speed there is one ‘object’ that far surpasses anything built or is still at the drawing board stage. No, it is not a meteor or a shooting star or an alien spacecraft with futuristic technology beyond the limited comprehension of us miserable earthlings. It is in fact the supersonic velocity of political and allied events occurring daily and hourly in our country, with one strange scenario being quickly overshadowed by an even more bizarre one, and all at a breath taking speed, forcing the people to follow helplessly in their wake.
The poor print media is most affected, for while the electronic media can effectively utilise the convenient device of ‘breaking news’ in a rapidly changing news situation (sometimes indeed without any real cause) to keep their viewers updated, the former are compelled either to chop and change their content and earlier expressed views or appear obsolete and humdrum.
The latest political improvised explosive device that left people from all walks of life shocked and stunned was the BBC revelation regarding the Indian funding (of course based on the good neighbour policy) of the MQM, and its possible ramifications in the establishment. A ban on the party is reportedly within the realm of possibility, also mindful of its past shady record. The nation witnessed the emergency exit of our version of Bonny and Clyde, the brother and sister ruling duo of Sindh, in somewhat mysterious circumstances that were akin to fleeing the crime scene. A question mark is being raised over their prompt return. Still earlier, there was the small matter of the fire breathing speech of the last will and testament co-chairman of the martyr’s party. The man has cashed and squeezed the tragedies of ZAB and BB to the last drop and the last spiritual calorie. Possibly, only the Holocaust has been exploited more in the guilt and greenbacks department, much to the disgust of the actual victims of the camps. Then there was the capture in Chaman of the two persons alleged involved in the Dr Imran Farooq murder, raising a host of questions. Earlier still… but then one has to end somewhere… The point is that there is hardly a dull moment to sit back and listen to the murmur of the rain and other such puerile pursuits in our environment of breakneck speed news and mostly disturbing events.
While the MQM has hotly denied the latest accusations against it, the well-documented history of body bags, extortion, murder by target killers, and corruption stands solidly against it
While the MQM has hotly denied the latest accusations against it, the well-documented history of body bags, extortion, murder by target killers, and corruption stands solidly against it. The hate-filled and violent fulminations of its ‘infallible’ and eternal leader are fit to be listed in a little black book and flung back in his face when the time comes. The ranting and ravings of his minions (or are they clones or zombies) and their shrill protestations of injured innocence and victimisation fool no one anymore. The times, they have become even more interesting than intended or implied in the clichéd Chinese proverb.
As regards the other stakeholders, one had thought that the vile practice of thuggery, the robbing of peaceful everyday travellers on the highways of northern India by the followers of the vengeful goddess Kali had been stamped out by the British in the mid-nineteenth century. But one might have been mistaken. The despicable cult or something similar to it is very much alive and well in the power corridors of Pakistan, especially in that hallowed abode of so many (repeat: so many, not all) highwaymen, the parliament and in the august offices of the ‘heaven born’ bureaucrats. Both have contributed generously in strangulating Pakistan in key areas. And of these two parasites, the one seldom has time enough to appear in full force in the assembly due to its extra-curricular wheeling-dealings and scams, while the second is concerned mainly with corruption, kickbacks and commissions, and most of all, with remaining in the good books of the powers that be, even as shoeshine boys and personal servants.
Every day brings some new scandal, nowadays of billions and trillions, leaving a new question mark hanging on the basic scruples and honesty of the so called elite. The trail of the mysterious missing necklace donated by the Turkish First Lady for flood victims has shamefully led to the door of a former prime minister. But, no surprises there as it could easily have been another couple of prime ministers, known to be corrupt to the core, and of course, a former president, the spiritual granddaddy of all financial mischief. Politics, under democracy’s convenient umbrella and criminal activities, have become inextricably intermingled.
During a session, observe the massive and grand, though mostly empty, hall of the parliament building. It is built along the expansive lines of the business class area of a leading airline (certainly not PIA). There is plenty of leg room, and the executive type chairs seem flexible enough for a member to stretch back into snooze mode, particularly if some boring urgent business of state is on the agenda. Of course, this languid position can quickly change to one of edge-of–the-seat alertness and keen interest and lead to much vigorous thumping of desks if the matter of doubling the members’ salaries and perks is being debated (if that is the right word).
Compare this huge hall to the cramped House of Commons in Westminster, where the members are seated almost shoulder to shoulder in what appear to be hard and uncomfortable seats, meant for serious work. Contrast the great leaders that have graced that room (except Tony Blair!) and their immense accomplishments with the depressing mediocrity of our own leaders and their aversion to House business, as evidenced in the repeated lack of quorum. The ‘first among equals’ is the leading culprit in the matter of assembly absenteeism, unless there is a dharna taking place outside.
The bane of our political system lies in the overwhelming presence of two powerful but callous and conscienceless groups, the business tycoon and the landed classes, in the parliament. Both are basically ill-fitted for the role of democrats, the first because of business distractions and the personal profit motive(leading to obvious conflict of interest situations), the second due to its supreme arrogance and above the law mindset and its holding of the worker or peasant in utter contempt (sometimes literally in chains on massive estates). Some of the readers (if at all any) must be yelling: There is this third force also, the umpire ever ready to raise his finger and send the civilians packing back to the pavilion or even to prison.
However, they now wisely enter the equation peripherally and only when misgovernance begins to weaken overall state security and the country’s strategic and economic interests. It is weak and indecisive leadership and the shenanigans of the civilian leaders themselves which afford sufficient space and an opportunity to ‘the others’ to muscle in.
The elected (there is also a big question mark on the fairness of the whole electoral process) leaders hardly concern themselves with the weal and woe of their constituents preferring to stay aloof from the masses (now mere ‘low life’) that had chosen them. By failing both in providing economic relief to the people and in preserving a close liaison with supporters after the elections, the politicians lose their street power and public support. They stand on extremely shaky ground then and are vulnerable to an extra-parliamentary threat.
Ex-President Asif Ali Zardari represented a new type of figure in our environment, what may be termed an adventurer-politician. A fortunate (only for him) marriage and the tragic assassination of his spouse, catapulted him, or he catapulted himself, into the top slot of the PPP and the presidency of the country. In the bargain, and with a permanent wide grin, he reportedly enriched himself and his favourites fabulously. The number of corruption cases in which his name was bruited about was legendary. It still is. The Guinness Book of World Records should look into it, as a grave injustice is being done in not recognising the world champion in this dubious sphere.
Also, ever since the last regime, the elected prime minister has had a one point agenda only: lasting his full five years, and the country can go to blazes. In achieving this end, the first casualty is principles and the second the national interest. Devious opportunistic alliances with the strangest bedfellows one day, shaking hands with sworn enemies of the party another, and somersaulting on both a third day, just to cling to power is the norm. An alarming new phenomenon was also observed. The civilian leadership secretly sought the help of foreign countries (read our love-hate friend, the USA) in a foolhardy and provocative attempt to clip the military’s wings by a resort to too-clever-by-half measures, such as the Kerry-Lugar Bill and Memo-Gate.
Apart from infantile regression, most of our politicians also suffer from foot-in-mouth (FIM) disease, an unfortunate malady which compels them to say the absolutely wrong (or worst possible) thing at the most inopportune time. And, all the time, the chorus of their rumoured corruption and criminal financial dealings grows into a Wagnerian crescendo.
One thing is for sure: the commanding ‘man of destiny’ or ‘the coming man’ marked for leadership by ‘higher powers’ will not be treading our road in the foreseeable future
The worst example of FIM disease was the recent wild-eyed outpouring of Asif Ali Zardari against the army and its current chief (now being hotly denied) about which it can rightly be said that ‘it contained every cliché in the repertoire except God is Love and please adjust your dress before leaving!’ Unfortunately, such is the dread of the party leader that not a single voice was raised from among the Old Guard and the saner elements against this extremely offensive and indiscreet rant. Instead of apologising, even in the superficial manner of the Karachi ersatz Quaid (still loath using the last word for him), he first got an endorsement from ‘his’ Central Executive Committee and then went about forming a national front of opportunists, elements hostile to the country and spent cartridges to back him up in his war of words with the army. How stupid (‘the greatest sin’, Oscar Wilde called stupidity!) can you get, or is it a sign of something even more alarming rooted in his personal history? Can not the senior members of the party, who seem to be in ‘servile fearfulness’ of him force the issue of leadership?
What is missing in our leaders of all hues? Firstly, personal integrity and plain idealism, the crucial question that ‘either I can be rich or my country can be rich’, posed to himself by the late founder of Singapore, Lee Kwan Yew. Or as Julius Caesar nobly remarks in the Bards’ play, ‘What touches us ourself, shall be last served’. The ‘many-headed multitude’ always came first.
Then, their weakness and vacillation, lack of any principles and scruples, which make them stumble blindly into blunder after blunder and scandal after scandal.
Also, the unsavoury qualities that they are positively dripping with: Arrogance, pride, swagger and boastfulness. Beowulf is an Anglo-Saxon epic poem of the eighth century celebrating the exploits of the Danish hero of the title. When Beowulf is boasting in the mead hall of his past exploits, he is warned by the wise old king Hrothgar:
Beloved Beowulf, best of warriors,
Resist this deadly taint, take what is better,
Your lasting profit. Put away arrogance,
Noble fighter!
Then, in describing the qualities of a famous and much-beloved dead king, the anonymous poet of the epic remarks:
They said that he was of all the world’s kings,
The gentlest of men, and the most gracious,
The kindest to his people, the keenest for fame.
And remember this was the barbaric age of feudalism, warriors, giants and monsters. Be that as it may, the qualities of its leaders described above are still something that our own feeble minded rulers can learn from in the modern day!
But one thing is for sure: the commanding ‘man of destiny’ or ‘the coming man’ marked for leadership by ‘higher powers’ will not be treading our road in the foreseeable future. So what remains? Nikita Khrushchev, the Soviet leader once remarked in his typically folksy way to the party members, ‘Comrades, if you cannot catch the Bird of Paradise, better settle for a wet hen!’ So for us, the best bet (or wet hen) would be a national government (strictly monitored by you know who), using a minus 10 formula for each party (but minus about 5,000 for the MQM and minus 18 for the PML-N, which is an extended First Family) to build the big dams, resolve the energy and water crises, stamp out the corruption culture, appoint the right men on merit to the crucial ministries, recover the loot stashed abroad, and also oversee all the China Pakistan Economic Corridor Projects till their completion! All these gigantic tasks are way beyond the scope of our present amateurish and mercenary-minded bunch of so-called leaders, with no one following!
