Matches are no longer made in heaven
Showing overwhelming support to Saudi Arabia’s decision to bar Saudi men from marrying women from Pakistan, Chad, Myanmar and Bangladesh, a Pakistani local cleric has also produced a fatwa disallowing the same.
Earlier this month a report outlined that over 500,000 women or more originating from these countries were currently living in Saudi Arabia. In a bid to ensure that Saudi men do not favour foreign brides over local women, regulations surrounding imported wives were further tightened. If a man wishes to wed a woman from another country he must first submit several marriage applications and get official approval from the government before he can proceed.
In an odd twist the local cleric from Pakistan has produced a fatwa which is meant to ensure that Pakistani men do not marry women from Pakistan, Bangladesh, Myanmar or Chad either. The cleric has suggested that Pakistani men that wish to marry women from their own country, or any of the other three outlined, must first apply for similar consent to the Saudi government before they can proceed. The cleric Maulana Habib-ul-Yak exclusively spoke to Pakistan Today to explain his fatwa, “We must always follow Saudi Arabia, it is the capital of Islam. I am surprised I am the first one to address this issue. If the supreme country for Muslims doesn’t feel that women from these countries are fit as brides, then how can we? Any good Muslim in Pakistan will Alhamdulillah pay heed!” he said.
Some people are calling the move a confused one citing the lack of an original fatwa as the main problem. An opposing and equally popular cleric Maulana Atish said that “We should wait for a fatwa to come through from Saudi Arabia itself before we issue such fatwas for our people. I agree that Saudi Arabia is the supremacist of supreme countries, they have the Kaaba afterall, and we should always ALWAYS follow their footsteps. Who are we to issue a fatwa on our own? We have no such authority, Astaghfirullah.”
“It seems this was only a notification from the government, and Pakistanis who have trouble following their own rules and regulations will have a huge problem implementing a foreign law. This problem may resolve overtime but in the short term it is an issue,” he said.
On the other hand, local women responded with mixed reactions to the new fatwa. Bibi Izhar-e-Nargiz is well respected in her community as a prominent matchmaker. “When I first heard the news I didn’t know how to react. Of course it’s Saudi Arabia and indeed we must follow any fatwas that are inspired by the great land, but it is chaos here. Where am I supposed to find brides for all these helpless mothers that come to me with their sons’ pictures and biodata now? How am I supposed to cater to my clients after this ban?”
Bibi is now considering new tools that she can use to rectify the situation. “I am actively looking for girls with foreign passports… you know the ones who were born abroad but got dragged back to Pakistan by their parents so that they wouldn’t go crazy. Those girls were always easier to get hitched anyway. Other than that I’ve made a Facebook page and started a Twitter account under the name ‘Bibi Izhar-e-Nargiz finds Good Girls’, and I’m hoping to find girls from countries that haven’t been banned for our poor boys here. I’m positive this will work.”
Some women also welcomed the news and were overjoyed that they would now forcibly have to end up finding their spouses elsewhere. “Pakistani men have been brought up in the worst possible misogynistic and patriarchal setup around. Great that they’re not allowed to marry us, we’ll find better men and we’ll be happier as we do it,” exclaimed an excited woman on the condition of anonymity.
However, not all people have taken the news all that well. Sheikh Tahir Ali Malik, a young student, has several issues with the new law. “I am the first to support everything that is Saudi. I mean look at my license place. It reads Al-Bakistan and not Pakistan. I think Pakistan is totally uncool. I always talk in favour of the holy land, I even added a Sheikh at the beginning of my name to feel closer to being an Arab. But this ban will ruin my life. “Meri khala ki beti se shadi honi thi yar. Ab mein kya karon ga? Kash woh Pakistani na hoti,” he lamented before bursting into tears.
At present people aren’t precisely sure what the fallout from this fatwa will mean for Pakistan and it is the wedding industry which has been on a boom even during times when poverty and unemployment have been sky high. Wedding planners, decorators, hall owners and other vendors are gearing for a storm, one where people will either marry in secret or not marry at all, of course in the name of Saudi pride.
Subhanallah.
The author often plays matchmaker in her spare time and is an avid follower of fatwas. To discuss your marriage potential, email at: [email protected].
What a load of BS….are we serious
rofl..this is awsum man..
Thank god, finally some measure to control the population of Pakistan, otherwise we were headed to moon.
LOL, so we should marry Arab women? ewww please no. Arab women have masculine features, this is why niqab is compulsory in Arab countries.
Ridiculous. Saudi holds the holy cities Mecca and Medina but honestly no one (Quran or Sunna) declares the country itself as the ultimate word! Saudi made this rule to promote their own native women; while Pakistan demotes them. Pakistan is making itself to be a joke.
I am sorry to say that Saudi Government does not follow the teachings of Islam or Sunnah.
Mohammad SAW said that all muslims are equal and Momin (Muslim) is the brother of other Momin.
But Saudi Government does not consider Pakistani men or women equivalent to Saudi men or women that is why they restrit their citizens from marrying Pakistani women.
I protest aginst this and other biased and un Islamic laws of Saudi Government.
Dear mufti sahab. Go for some medical consultation. You need medical help!
When it rains in Saudia Arab, go out holding an umbrella in Pakistan.
Totally hilarious 😀
A good piece of satire, this article could be if it would be kept only up to fatwa part but adding multiple imaginative responses of fatwa and lengthening it unnecessarily has spoiled its beauty. Sorry.
This is raciest, offensive. Its almost like Saudi people are a superior-race and what they do, we should follow
As for being this Islamic, it's not! It just simply is something they have enforced in Saudi law, to control the social problems women have to face marrying Saudi men, just like camel races and child jockeys, these 3rd world countries are cheap source for brides.
This may well be what one-night stand is in the west for the Saudi men. Only finding halal ways to do it =S Halal by Saudi standards, not Islamic.
What about those who are already "illegally" married against the fatwa.
Hilarious. Was believing most of it until halfway. They say the best satire is believable, lolll judging from above responses – Well written!
Habib-ul-Yak ne Yakki maar di
it would scary if this were true…and you never know with such people, kabhi bhi kuch bhi keh/ker saktay hain :/
I'm finding the satire here much more subtle and amusing than some of the others like NFP. People actually believe the stuff written here. Hats off!
What about following Saudi fatwa of women should not drive!
Saudi has social ills and the fatwa is to promote Saudi men marrying Saudi women. This has been practiced in UAE since ages, discouraging Arabs marrying non Arabs.
Take it on its face value, don't add Pakistani mulla intelligence into it. What have most Pakistani mulla done for Islam and for the country except creating hatred between Muslims due to their own illiteracy.
You can not demote one populatkon of women to try and make another more appealing. The biggest problems are being caused by marriages not being from love but need and greed. Oppressing Pakistani women further satire or not is a plague on humanity. Allah will not be kind to those who are unkind to humanity. People should be allowed to wed who they choose.
ive heard of some ridiculous things but this takes the cake xD
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