If marriage is like going into business with someone, then having an affair is like blowing away the profits. If you’re willing to risk destroying your marriage, at least make sure that other person doesn’t have two million followers on Twitter. Here’s a list that details why this is a bad idea:
Babysitter
This one is sort of like the assistant one. When you break up with your spouse, you’re going to need a good babysitter more than ever. And you know who isn’t going to like to hear the “I can’t go out tonight because I can’t find a babysitter” line? Your former babysitter.
Politician
Do you remember the women Herman Cain allegedly had affairs with? No? Well, do you know who does remember? Every single one of that woman’s friends and family.
Co-worker
The old office romance is fraught with peril because office gossip can spread like wildfire, and loose lips can sink ships. And by ships, I mean your marriage. Or, if you are a sea captain and your ex-wife is your vindictive ex-first mate, actual ships as well.
Blogger/Author
Much like stand-up comedians, the best bloggers and authors take their material from their real-life experiences. So the very thing that will get them thousands of page views or an eager fan base for their books, is the same thing that will get you thrown out of the house by your angry spouse.
Your Child’s Teacher
Cheating on your spouse is bad no matter what, but do you want your kid to totally lose respect for two authority figures at once?
Stand-Up Comedian
“True story-I was having an affair with this married person, and you’d never believe what happened.” That’s how the joke on national TV will start and then it’ll ruin your life. You probably won’t find it very funny.
Cult Leader
The only time this might be OK would be if you are cheating on your wife with Billy Duffy, the lead singer of the rock band, The Cult.
