Divorce rates climb

By
anjum
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26
1288

Marriage is a funny institution. It begins with much fanfare, be it a product of love or arranged by family. Some consider early marital life to be the most fulfilling. But many couples experience negative changes after they start living together and become used to each other’s habits. Arguments and fights become the order of the day and the husband and wife become intolerable to each other and they opt for divorce. The fanfare with which it began meets a silent end.
Increasing divorce rate: The divorce rate has been on the rise in Pakistan over the last decade. In Lahore city alone more than 100 divorces are registered in family courts in a day. The divorce rate is increasing not only in the upper class of society but also in lower and middle classes. From February 2005 to January 2008 approximately 75, 000 divorce cases had been registered. From February 2008 to May 2011, 1, 24141 divorce cases were registered. Around 2, 59064 separations have taken place in the provincial metropolis over the last decade. In 2010, 40,410 separation cases were registered in the city’s family courts and 13,500” divorces have been filed so far in 2011.
Experts put down social change as the main reason for a rising number of divorces. More and more women are now able to live on their own and are now fully aware of their rights. Experts say career-oriented women are more prone to taking divorce than housewives. Experts describe forced marriages, lust, infidelity, joint family system, misunderstandings, lack of trust, financial pressures and differences in social status as other reasons for a high divorce rate.
Talking to Pakistan Today, Solicitor Zafar Iqbal, who is an expert in family laws, said the divorce rate increased after amendments to Muslim Family Court Act in 2001. He blamed non-government organizations (NGOs) and the electronic media for an increasing number of divorces. “NGOs are not fully aware of our societal fabric; they only raise slogans of freedom. The media is exploiting women; women have become a product you can buy or sell easily,” he said. Iqbal said 85 percent of love marriages end up in separations. Even couple having children do not hesitate to take divorce; resultantly children’s lives are ruined and they become a victim of inferiority complex, he added.
He said after amendments to the family laws it has now become easier to take divorce. He said judges who hear divorce cases lack experience and sometimes announce verdict in the first hearing.
Another lawyer Javed Abbass Mirza said in the past the word ‘divorce’ was a taboo in Pakistani society, but now people do not feel ashamed of getting divorce. He said women come to file their cases along with their parents, which shows that parents support their daughters in getting divorce. He said women are acquiring higher education and contributing to every sector of society and they are not a burden anymore. “Working women who are financially strong are less willing to save their marriages and can quickly opt for divorce. When a woman is financially strong, she doesn’t feel the need to compromise,” he said. Mirza said divorce is increasing mostly among couples between ages 22 and 30.
Psychiatrist Irfan Muneer said the divorce rate is higher among educated families. He said laws have been made which support women seeking divorce and the whole procedure has been made easier. Muneer said Pakistan is a male-dominated society and men want their wives to stay back home, look after their children and not to think about their careers. “This situation becomes worse when both sides refuse to compromise and show egotistical attitude. Lack of tolerance and unwillingness to compromise is playing a vital role in increasing number of divorces in Pakistan,” he said.
Another psychiatrist Najeeb Zaheer said Indian and western cultural invasion is aggravating the situation. He said females who watch TV channels want to buy costly items at all cost, sometimes at the expense of their marriage. He said husbands’ ego also had a role in an increasing number of divorces. He said divorced couple’s children live an unhealthy life and therefore parents should have to realize that they have a responsibility towards their children. “Marriage is a big decision in one’s life, and should be taken, only when one is mature enough to handle all that comes with it. Forced marriages and early marriages are a reality in Pakistan and need to be stopped,” he said.
Atique whose parents separated when he was only three years old said, “I could never understand why parents opted for divorce. Parents should think about their children as well while taking such decisions.” Momina, 25, who parents separated when she was a child, blamed third party influence for increasing divorces. She said couples should sort out issues on their own, rather than allowing someone else to interfere in their lives.

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26 COMMENTS

  1. Divorce is not a final verdict as people think.As you wrote earlier what is the fault of Children.There life became target by relatives.When there parents get married again they are living the life without care,love and affection.If first marriage child is girl then again its a big social problem as she is not " MAHARAM" to her new father.At that stage this also not only big problem but also big threat.
    I wanna request to everyone wheather male or female please not only think of themselves but more about their children.PLEASE PLEASE THINK AGAIN AND AGAIN

  2. i want to request to all the parents that if your son or daughter does not want to marry to person of your choice please leave them and do not compel them to marry because it is the matter of their whole lives. please do not force them if they don't like a person because forced marriages leads to divorce also.

  3. i think devorce normally happens because of mother in law and and sisters of husbands attitude………….i also think that the responsible of devorce may always be husband not wife……………the devorce is increasing due to intolerable attitude of husbands……………….i have seen on my own eyes that many devorce happens due to mother in laws attitude they compell thir sons to give marriage to his wife…i know that it is a saying that there is a heaven under mothers puts but in this case i will not support my and others people mothers…………………..i request the pakistani people that please before giving devorce think more than 1000 times because you are not only damaging your own life but also damaging the life of a respectable women or a girl…………so respect your wives please please please please…………………

    • i guess u should read the above analysis by law experts , this is the ir responsible behavio r of women to cause the divorce not the men. instead of blaming mothers, u must blame indian and foriegn media invasion and culture which is the main cause

      • aoa, my name is hooriya my mother in law and husband force me to seperate with them through khula . my family is v disturbed. they are actually greedy peoples demands every time to take money from ur father and family . physically torcher me alot . i m v upset now a days

        • Do you have kids, and how long you have been married? i hope your married life is good now as your status is showing that you post these comments 81 weeks ago. I know one hooriya and i really wish that you are NOT the same hooriya what i'm thinking about. Well wishes.

  4. Momina, 25, who parents separated when she was a child, blamed third party influence for increasing divorces. SHOULD HAVE BEEN Momina, 25, whoSE parents ….

  5. and i am an example of it. it was a love marriage and his family never accepted. and i lost. and now im not happy and hez not happy. so mother in laws and sisters should understand. and i know they will suffer and regret.

  6. Youth is going away from islamic values as Allah dislike divorce except in unavoidable circumstances, parents and elders were role model to establish values of nikah and nature of relationship between husband and wife, now our youth mainly following impact of so called free society where women is used for all purpose good or bad and also affect of boy and girl friend as our media is not leaving any efforts to destroy national character under the cover of recreation through copying free society culture, we should think that grip of Allah is very strong, PAkistan is also in that grip since this country was created on the basis of religion, this was same country which was a prosper and peaceful land 2 decades before, same land full of problem since people are following evilish act and dis obeying Allah and have become hpocrate, see the nation which were destroyed and wiped out from earth as they liked doing such bad thing what we are doing . May Allah give all muslims right path and pakistanis too. from abroad

  7. Love iz life . Thix ix wroung becx ur love lost your life .
    Guyxx plzz dnt love becx ur parentx ix not agree wd ur love marraige .
    Arrange marraige ix the best marraige

  9. I think men these days are influenced by too much porn, and when they marry they want their wives to do the tricks like the porn stars.. and then when they refuse they divorce.. so sad 🙁

  11. Well as a matter of Fact change as to come from the girls side , Why mother in law or sister in law becomes the root cause of divorce of their child ??
    I see girls who are even good in character are stamped with label of Divorce even when the girl was (Mazloom and Innocent) and took khula.
    Could any one tell me whats how many guys marry a divorced girl In pakistan ??
    NON , all because even if they wanted to marry the divorced girl, parents disagree , specially Mothers, when it comes to "EGO" of their family. So the change has to come from female side.
    Girls should leave this modernization system and leave them selves to Islamic Sharia and being Islamic Women everything you've lost will regain In'sha Allah.

    Love before Marriage causes problems , it's better to love and to be loved after marriage but parents should realize to whom they are marrying their son should be Religious (deendar) girl (their this Hathis also on this) , Freedom from the educating girl come to point of self sufficient living ,resulting divorce, all because the girl can live by her own self. Religious women will thing twice of taking divorce or going against their Husbands.

  12. Sir, where have you taken the statistics of divorce and separation? I need the data for research purpose. Can u provide the exact figures?

  15. In western nations, for example, the U.s., which has a separation rate expanding steadily, the commonness of separation is frequently seen as an unfortunately normal unavoidable truth. The Ottawa Divorce Lawyers & Family Law Firm told to me,They are facing the number of cases in every year. http://www.daviesdivorcelaw.com/

  17. Though divorce rate is very high in west but even they consider and think about their children they get divorced when their children are mature enough to handle the situation an other positive thing present in west is the responsible state if divorce taking place when children are small and both the parents are irresponsible then state take responsibility to take care of children.

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